can I call the police....

[firsttimemummy12345]

if my partner locks me in the house to stop me from leaving or he won't let me leave the house with our son cause he can't look after him?

Course he's going to go for full custody of a child he can't even look after for 5 minutes without handing back to you... Can you see that threats like that are just another way of controlling you?

Please try to calm down and take no notice of his threats. Where are you now? Do you have family or friends that you can go to? Do you have your son with you? Please talk to your HV, or your GP as soon as you can.

Your DP is being very unsupportive at the least, at most, very abusive. You need support right now. And you are not 'psycho'.

Don't bother telling him he's EA. He will deny it and put it back on you

You need out of the relationship. It could become very dangerous

First chance you get, phone the police and Women's Aid

Sunshine! It's NOT YOU! Honestly, it's not.

You can text the police if you can't call.

If an emergency happens we advise you only to use SMS to contact the emergency services if you have no other option. This is because it will take longer than other methods such as 999 or 18000
When you need to send an SMS text message to 999 and you cannot use the standard voice 999 service or the Text Relay 18000 service create an SMS message containing the details below:
Which?Need Ambulance, Coastguard, Fire Rescue, or Police
What?Briefly, what is the problem
Where? Exactly where is it
Give the name of road and town

Plus more information like:
house number; or
nearby landmarks or main roads

For example your SMS text message might read:
'ambulance. man having a heart attack. outside post office. valley road watford'
If you include this information the emergency services will not have to ask as many questions and will be able to respond quicker.
Please be as accurate as possible when giving the location. The better your information is the faster the emergency services will be able to send help.

Now send the SMS message to 999.

The emergency service will reply to you asking either for more information or telling you that help is on the way.
Do not assume that your message has been received until you get a message back from the emergency service, an SMS 'Delivery Report' does not mean your message has been received.

He can't out you in a mental health hospital, it doesn't work like that. The only person that can have you sectioned is a doctor (or the police, temporarily). And believe me, they've heard it all before when it comes to abusive partners.

Please talk to your health visitor.

I don't drive and my family live 10 miles away. not far but it is on the bus or taxi.

I feel so stupid for punching the wall my knuckles are all bruised and really hurt now.

Are you safe?

I got my HV coming Monday and I got my 6 week check up on Wednesday I'll talk to them both about it then. I also feel like I'm going back to when my eating disorder started. not eating for days feeling down and wanting to take my own life. I know I can't as I have a gorgeous little boy who is my world.

I am at the moment. he's being nice to me now and I'm just keeping the peace until I see my HV and ask for her help.

thought I'd give you all an update. this is the first time he has been like this (I'm not backing him up cause what he done was wrong on so many levels) and he has been having a lot of stress at work but it doesn't excuse him for what he done or might have been thinking.

anyway....I told him before we went to bed I'm going to sleep on the sofa bed with the LO so you can sleep so you ain't grumpy for work and so you're away from me. he broke down crying and said it's a knoll his fault and he didn't mean any of it (I know they say that to lure you back in) but what I'm going to do is keep an eye on him wrote down everything he does and report back to the HV. I'm going to ask her for a number I can get her on straight away incase I have any problems.

why aren't you running away you you're probably thinking. I don't have the money to get out now and I'm not due back to work till August and I have no savings either.

You don't need money to leave an abusive relationship.

Please make contact with your nearest branch of Women's Aid and they'll tell you how they can help you: www.womensaid.org.uk/domestic-abuse-directory/

Talk to your health visitor on Monday, tell her how you've been feeling and what has been happening over the weekend, but please don't expect her to provide a 24/7 helpline service that you can call when you're having problems with him as this is more properly dealt with by the police.

Ten miles isn't a great distance. In an emergency couldn't one of your family members drive over to get you and your dc, or call a cab to pick you up that they can pay for when you arrive at their place?

Honey, there is always a first time for EA,and can guarantee it will be followed by a second and third til you don't know which way is up. The apology means nothing unless he is willing to change his behaviour. You are right it is just a way to suck you back in.
Deffo speak to your health visitor and make her aware of the situation, and try to speak to Women's Aid also. Also have a look at How a seemingly healthy relationship turns abusive posted on the She knows website. It shows you all the red flags to look out for.
Hugs for you, I really feel for you x