I've been with my DH for 12 years. I have DS16 from a previous relationship and we have a DD together.
My DS has been causing lots of stress at home, some of it "normal" teenage behaviour but some of it more than that eg, doing badly at school- recently excluded for 2 days for defiant behaviour, verbal abuse at home. My DS has ADHD, was taking medication but hated the side effects and to be honest I don't think they made much difference, if anything they made him more irritable. My DH and I are at a really bad place at the moment. My DH has told me he resents me , feels I've ruined his life and feels trapped . My DH has been so good to my DS over the years, he's supported him and really tried hard to have a good relationship with him but they clash and the stress is difficult to manage at times.I'm going to arrange family therapy as feel it would be good to talk with a neutral person to try to work through it all. I just feel so low, I can't stop crying. I just want us all to be happy. I feel I should move out with my DS as that would stop the arguments between DH and DS but can't stand the thought of living apart from my other DD who is only 5, she's done nothing wrong. I don't want her to feel I've abandoned her.
I just don't feel I can stay in a situation where everyone is so unhappy. My DH is desperate to move as he hates the area and the house we are living in, however this is difficult due to jobs. My DH blames me for the current situation as it was my idea to move to where we live now. My DH is constantly telling me how much he resents me and he says it in such a nasty, vicious way. When I try to talk to him about it he tells me he's not listening as " you're going on". I feel like we are going round in circles.
Any words of wisdom would be appreciated.