Would you ask your DP to pick up your DC from school?

[Tearsoffrustration]

My DP finishes work at around 2:30 so would be home in time for the school run if we lived together. At the moment my mum picks up my DC on the days I work (2 days) would you ask your DP to do it? If no, would you when the children you have together go to the same school?

I didn't, when I wasn't living with my DH, it didn't feel right to be foisting my parenting responsibilities on to him, but then he also wasn't available due to work so it's a bit hypothetical. He never spent time alone with the dc until after we were married and living together though. I think it would be different if you have dc together though because it would be odd to pick up just his own dc and not yours as well.

If you do have children together and they go to the same school as your children, it would be ridiculous for him to pick up your mutual children while your mother picked up the ones which were just yours. If he thinks this is reasonable, don't move in or have children with him. He's mean, unhelpful and unsupportive.

However, by the time you do have children together, and the younger ones go to school, it's likely that the older ones will be at different schools. My advice is pick local schools and then the older ones can walk home. He'll be in with the younger ones. Tidy.

For now, it would be nice if he would offer to pick up your children but I'm not sure you should expect it. You have a current arrangement which works. Would your mum like to give up the obligation or does she enjoy having the children? Does he start work really early and needs a bit of P&Q when he gets home from work before the rest of you descend upon him? Is he showing signs that he doesn't like your children and would see them as a burden rather than showing enthusiasm for your new blended family?

I've picked my boyfriend's kids up from school a couple of times when he's been stuck and his ex couldn't do it but I wouldn't want to do it on a regular basis.