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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

what do I do.

7 replies

Fuckduckcluck · 09/02/2016 15:17

My oh and I split up. Well he left me. Not much of a reason, and tbh I can't handle knowing why.

He's been staying until he finds somewhere else, and it's been normal. Like nothing ever happened. It's been killing me.

Today, a week before what should have been our anniversary, he's packing up and leaving, after I got up the courage to say that it wasn't right, it's dragging it all out, so if you're going, go.

Kids are with their dad (not oh) and I've been out all day trying to avoid the empty house. They have no idea this has been going on and really fell for him as much as me.

I Have to go back though. To an empty house, alone.

Really don't want to go back home. This has left me devastated and I don't know what to do with myself.

Sorry. Not making much sense. Didn't want this. I don't know what to do now.

OP posts:
louisejanep · 09/02/2016 15:31

Sorry to hear this, how long were you together? The first day of him leaving is always going to be the hardest but i promise it will get better. Has he gone for good? Or just to clear his head and have a break? Has this happened before?

Angieyy1 · 09/02/2016 15:48

I'm sorry I'm going through it too I don't have much advise ..... To offer you I just know how painful it is xx

OldestStory · 09/02/2016 18:17

It's horrible.

On a practical note of what to do, I read on here a tip to buy lovely new bedding. Have raided ikea online and have cosy duvet, new pillows and swanky bed linen, all for a snip. I know it seems silly, but it helps. Plus online shopping is a good distraction.

Beachlovingirl · 09/02/2016 18:23

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Suddenlyseymour · 09/02/2016 20:48

I used to find the silence upon going into the house hideous; i'd sometimes sit outside in my car delaying going in. I found switching on the radio straight away really helped

ProfessorPickles · 09/02/2016 20:56

I really like the practical advice on this thread like getting new bedding etc. I can imagine that would help make things feel different and new in a more positive way. Hope you're ok OP, a week from now and things will be better. You'll still be hurting but hopefully it should feel less raw

honeyroar · 09/02/2016 21:23

I did the bedding thing. Bought something I loved and he wouldn't have. Bought a new lamp. Bought a new scented candle. Changed the room around a bit. Watched a DVD that he would nt have liked. Have a posh bubble bath. Put your headphones on and dance while the house is empty. Realise that you can do anything you like.

Ps. You were right making him move out. You need to get him put of your space to move forward. Hope you're ok.x

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