How do I end the marriage?

[Blueprintorange]

Married to "D"H for 4 years, together for 12, we have a DD aged 3.

I want to end the marriage, I want to separate. I can't stand him, for a number of reasons and all we do is argue. I'm not blameless, we're as bad as each other. He laughs when I try and end it, and won't move out. I don't want to leave the family home because he won't let me take DD.

What do I do? I feel trapped. I can be financially independent, I work full time and any credit card debt we have is all on his cards although I understand we're both liable?

What steps do I need to take to leave him?

Go and see a solicitor.

See a solicitor, distance yourself from him, could you move into a spare room?
Stop doing his laundry, cooking etc, just look after you and dc

Divorce him. The rest will follow. Quit any wife work that directly benefits him and look just after you and dc. Do not shag him.

Re: the credit card debt, if the cards are in his name then they go with him & if it's a joint account, you are joint & severally liable for the debt. That's the legal position though the moral one is down to conscience if the debt has been acquired together, on his card

I thought all debts would be taken from the assets in a divorce?

Ok thank all.

He's been sleeping in the spare room which is good, and I'll make the effort not to do his washing etc. It's just so difficult to untangle myself from this relationship I just can't see how it will happen. We moved recently and have no equity in the house really, we borrowed nearly to our max to get a forever home.

His mere presence makes me on edge and angry, how can it come to this

People get divorced all the time. You will find a way x