Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

my so call best mate never get in touch with me...

20 replies

MerryBiglipsmas · 20/12/2006 10:31

as she had her first child when she was 17 and now got 3 kids with the same father. she is now 31.

i got back in touch with her April this year and she emailed me.. we emailed to each other a few times and every single time i mention to meet uo...i dont hear from her for weeks, months or most years..

i sent an email to say that i cant be bothered to keep in touch when she never keeps in touch. Her boyfriend emailed back to me and said that he doesnt want to come in between us as my best mate thinks highly of me and im one of her good friends, but he said that al these years that i didnt keep in touch dont expect my best mate to drop everything cos i want her to keep in touch now. Its the other way round!!!.... as for years i was the one whos did all the running where she never made any efforts whatsoever as her boyfriend said that they got a busy life with 3 kids now. but she had never made an efforts since she had her first child. Since April ive made about 7 attempts to meet up or even me to go to hers as she hadnt met my dd yet who is 26m and also her boyfriend said that she got no mates at all - i wonder why????

i dont want to fall out with her as she was my best mate throughout my teenage years.

OP posts:
Original poster
MerryBiglipsmas · 20/12/2006 10:55

what do i do??.... do i carry on chasing up after her? or wha?

OP posts:
Saturn74 · 20/12/2006 10:57

When was the last time you actually met up with her?

flutturkey · 20/12/2006 10:57

No just leave it, I have had a similar situation recently and I have just given up.

Original poster
MerryBiglipsmas · 20/12/2006 11:01

nearly 4 years ago i last met up with her and why it been 4 yrs ago cos i was getting fed up of chasing up after her and she never rings me (apart from when she rang up to see what i had had boy or girl and she will come down to mine and will ring me back which she didnt till i sent her a letter this April to meet up)

OP posts:
sunnysideup · 20/12/2006 11:03

Forget it. If she wanted to meet you she would have done so by now.

And what kind of GROWN UP gets their boyfriend to e-mail back? Why didn't she do it herself? How weird!

Forget her and get on with having fun with your family or other friends!

Original poster
MerryBiglipsmas · 20/12/2006 11:03

whats annoyed me now that her bf said that whilst i was partying out and she was stuck in.. i didnt bother with her !!!! but thats a lie as ive tried to meet up with her over the years but she doesnt seems wants to bother

OP posts:
nogoeswithbellson · 20/12/2006 11:05

The friendship has run its course. It is not worth falling out over but as others have said just concentrate on the friends is your life right now.

Original poster
MerryBiglipsmas · 20/12/2006 11:05

the reason why her bf emailed to me cos he seen my message first and wanted to tell me what he thinks!! as my friend doesnt seem to check her emails as often cos she got a VERY busy life..

Ive got 1 daughter but i make sure i make the efforts with all my friends who do the same to me but not this one!

OP posts:
overdraft · 20/12/2006 11:11

There could be lots of reasons i think. Perhaps she has deppression? That can stop you wanting to meet with people even though you really want to. Maybe she has put on weight or something and feels she dosen't want you to see her now. there could be loads of reasons other than the way she feels about you .

Original poster
MerryBiglipsmas · 20/12/2006 11:56

well she had put on alot of weight and maybe she is depressed but how would the hell i know if her bf checked her emails!!!!

OP posts:
kittylettekissingsanta · 20/12/2006 11:59

hi,

im the same as you,

my friend had her first baby at 17, i was constantly contacting her, went to see her with flowers pressies, she asked me to be the babys godmother,

she moved and i never heard from her till the baby was 18 months old - and baptised

so i didnt know where she lived, then she'll just turn up randomly about every year,

last time she did this she said she'd come round the next day (she visits my area weekly as the babys dad lives here - i have no connections in her area)

anyway i asked for her adress / phone number, she said shed give it me tomorrow,

she never came back.

i was 6 months pregnant with DS2 - who is now 6 months old

my advice would be not to contact her, shes just not interested in a friendship - dont bother wasting your energy

kittylettekissingsanta · 20/12/2006 12:00

ps, during the years i didnt see her, i found out she walked past my house every friday and sunday - she knew i was there, which hurt

hoxohoxohoxo · 20/12/2006 12:06

some people are just not worth it

If you are so far down their list of priorities not to warranta 2 minute phone call/ email then you don't mean anything to them

don't be content to be an after thought: have enough pride in yourself and have respect for yourself enough to ditch her

If she then wants to be friends then she will have to put in the effort.

dabihp · 20/12/2006 12:24

maybe her bf doesnt want her to see you?

wartywarthog · 20/12/2006 13:16

don't contact her anymore. you already sent an email saying you won't, now follow it through. if she wants to see you she can email / call.

bubsagrub · 20/12/2006 14:15

let go and move on.

Original poster
MerryBiglipsmas · 20/12/2006 14:41

thanks everyone as thats the best advice as if she wants to make an effort then she would so but obviously she doesnt!...

it is not worth losing sleep over it and she knows where i am.... wwll just thru email and phone call...she doesnt know where i live and ive lived here for the past 4 yrs...oh well ive got other friends who i do stay in touch

OP posts:
MerrilyTooBuzzi · 20/12/2006 14:50

Im following you from meetup thread!! Want to meet up on another day? I have to go in a minute to get kids from school but ill catch up later.

Original poster
MerryBiglipsmas · 20/12/2006 14:51

anyday from 2nd or 11th

OP posts:
Original poster
MerryBiglipsmas · 20/12/2006 14:52

oops! anyday APART from the 2nd or 11th!!

OP posts:
New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread