His family thought he was gay

[NervyNualaaa]

Drunken confession from him on first date. Was said jokingly because he is mid twenties but not yet brought a girl home. He's really nice but I thought it was an odd thing to say! Am I being silly...?

Yep.

Yes.

Yes.

So you don't think it's a bit weird to say that when you first meet someone, in a romantic context?!?!

Not weird at all.

Just a normal jokey thing to say.

No. It's a standard type of (lame but inoffensive) joke.

I don't think it's a bit weird if you're nervous.

He was drunk, probably nervous, it was a joke.

My DH said something similar. It was just because he was shy and he hadn't brought many girls home.

No. Not weird at all.

So what? Why do you think it's weird?

Ok I didn't think it weird at first but I told a friend who immediately said "God why would he say that?" And implied that maybe he was saying he was gay? Who knows. Glad to know its nothing to be concerned about though

You've posted elsewhere, too. You must be VERY WORRIED

Not at all weird, stop overthinking it.

I would hazard a guess that he was probably quite nervous and trying to lighten the mood. Also, he may feel under quite a lot of pressure from his family which may have made him more nervous. Anyway, surely it only matters how you felt, you friend wasn't on the date with you (I hope!)

I don't think so, necessarily - rather a naive remark in a deeply heterosexual 'we're supposed to be fancying one another' first date situation, maybe, but it's one of the available explanations for not having had a relationship with a woman by his mid-twenties.

It may be nothing, and I hope it is, but as they say - In Vino Veritas. Sometimes people only half joke, so this could turn out in retrospect to be a warning. I have had experience of exactly that and, even worse so has another member of my family who got together with a man who was denying his sexuality to himself, much to her (and his) long term regret.

Oh fuuuck I was worried someone was going to say that Freda

Why two threads?

Sorry - was an oversight! Wanted to get chat one moved to relationships but didn't know how

I would be more concerned about him getting drunk on a first date TBH. But perhaps that's because I'm a po-faced old cat lady who is bitter that she can't guzzle wine any more without gastric repercussions

We both were pocket! Shared a bottle of wine and couple of cocktails each, first date nerves on both parts i think

Well yes, some people went out today and got hit by a bus - it happens - but most of us didn't. So the worst happened in Freda's case but to me your date's comment looks like a harmless joke.

springy, of course you have a good point, yet the thread's headline is his family thought he was gay, and they know him well its reasonable to assume? To me that seems to lower the odds that it might actually be the case which was why I responded, not to cast a cloud over OP's romance.

Not weird at all. My hubs family thought the same... 44. Only dated a couple of times... Just laugh. It was intended as an icebreaker

I can only imagine what my family thought no girlfriends until my early twenties because I wasn't fussed plus being a disabled bloke meant that I wasnt a great catch anyway

I can only imagine that my dad's reaction was similar to Sid's dad in Skins upon seeing me with my first girlfriend.

So I honestly think it was a nervous comment made in a trying to break the ice way.