No intimacy

[Jamandcheese]

I have no one to talk to about this and it's start to make me feel Crap.

We've been married for 7 years and have two DC, 5 and 3.

But we aren't really intimate anymore. We don't kiss anymore apart from the perfunctory kiss in the cheek in the morning. We don't sleep together. Part from once or twice a year. It's been like this for two years. DH will hug me or lie down on the couch with me while we watch tv. But that's it. I feel like we are room mates who live together and just happen to have kids.

I don't feel loved anymore. I feel like we just do our duty and that's it. There's no real fun or spark between us.

We've been to therapy and we are still in the same boat. I feel like I'm always asking for kisses or suggesting we DTD. But nothing helps.

Just so I don't drip fees, we have been through a lot. DH had a one night stand and was caught drink driving. And that was why we went to therapy.

How long do I keep waiting? Do some couples just go through life with no intimacy and are ok?

*surprised I mean, typing one handed whilst feeding!

So the suggestion from Fate that I try and do all the stuff she suggested. I have done that. Try and compliment him, be romantic etc. but he gets uncomfortable and just makes it all into a jokey situation.

There is only so much I can do. And now it's started to wear at me. I used to be a complete romantic. Then the last seven years of up and downs have happened. And with him withdrawing from me intimately, I feel jaded. In respect to marriage and love.

To give him his dues, he does try to show me he cares in other ways. And I do appreciate those when he does do it. He's not a hugely romantic type. And I'm ok with that.

But I'm not ok with this huge gap between us. When I do try and talk about it outside of therapy, its ' never the right time' or ' let's not spoil the weekend'.

I feel lonely in this marriage. I know I've lost my confidence. I feel that it reflects on me and my sexuality as a woman. It maybe irrational but that's how I feel.