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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

how do you let something go with dignity?

10 replies

susannahmoodie · 24/12/2015 14:44

I have recently got a new job and it is a very big step up for me. I start in January and yesterday was my last day in my old job. I have been very happy in work for ages but then in the last couple of years there have been lots of changes, I got a new boss who was pretty terrible imo and I think this spurred me on to move on and in some ways I think it was exactly the thing I needed to stop me from getting complacent at work.

My boss and I have had a few differences of opinion but I thought we had moved on and I have really tried to make an effort with her. However, yesterday she wrote a sarky message in my leaving card and deleted me on fb.....(I know, I know, shouldn't have work people on there anyway).

I'm a bit put out but I just want to move on and let it go- does anyone have any advice as to how to actually do this? I have written down what I'd actually like to say to her but of course never actually would!! I have such happy memories of my job and feel like this has marred it a little.

Also beginning to think fb is quite poisonous.....but it is useful in some ways....

OP posts:
hesterton · 24/12/2015 14:46

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

timelytess · 24/12/2015 14:48

Find your internal 'ignore' button and click it. She wants you to feel deprived of her contact - don't. Laugh and move on.

Joysmum · 24/12/2015 14:54

Just goes to prove you were right to change jobs. This isn't about you it's about what's lacking in her Wink

Saltfish · 24/12/2015 14:54

I've always thought the best revenge is indifference. I'd give her zero reaction as she's probably a very bitter and unhappy person and thrives on conflict.
As for facey b..I've been off it for 4 months and feel amazing for it! I feel like the people who truly care about me know how to contact me.

ImperialBlether · 24/12/2015 14:56

Maybe write something like, "Such mixed feelings about leaving work. I had such happy times from 2010 - 2012."

Yoksha · 24/12/2015 16:10

" These people are not worth the time and effort distress needs to flourish "
^^
This from hesterton. Excellent advice. I've just texted it to my Dd.

susannahmoodie · 24/12/2015 16:51

I like the squashing the pea idea! And that indifference is the best revenge....

OP posts:
Chottie · 24/12/2015 17:12

Ignore, ignore, ignore.

You took what you needed from the job and have now moved on. Your ex bosses sarky comment shows she hasn't. Just leave her there and go forward. Good luck with your new job.

abbsismyhero · 24/12/2015 21:19

has she blocked you or just deleted you? if she has just deleted you find her and block her it's curiously satisfying you will never see her poison again

Feelingworriednow · 24/12/2015 22:11

Agree with ignoring...
I recently received an email from my old boss asking for a favour. She was a bully and I have lost count of the number of people she engineered out of our work place. She loathed me, utterly and completely and made no effort to hide it from everyone, so when she had to resign before she could be fired, it felt like all my Christmases had come at once!
I had all these clever responses to her request but just decided that turning my back on her would send enough of a message in itself. So I simply ignored, ignored, ignored! Felt good!

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