What's the weirdest present you've ever had from a date or partner?

[strawberryandaflake]

Following on from the terrible dates thread and the poor soul with novelty sponges... Bahahaaa!

What's the weirdest thing a partner or date has ever given you?

I got a webcam so we could 'talk' online. On a second date. Creep.

A Dyson for Christmas

A kitkat. I'm not fond of them at the best of times. "But it's chunky", said he, as if that would change anything.

My other ex once bought me one of those see through teddies in a size 16 when I was a size 8, and some handcuffs. We hadn't touched each other for over a year. Apparently it was seductive. It was not.

A copy of "A History of the World in 10 1/2 Chapters" by Julian Barnes wrapped in cat paper with ribbon and a bow. Given to me day after agreeing to go on first date, so pre-first date. Way to keep it light.

Ex-P bought me a horrible lingerie set. Think the type that third rate prostitutes might consider if times got hard. We're talking synthetic silk, ribbons and bows in a horrible cheapo red. The bra has peek-a-boo nipple holes and the pants were crotchless. His intention was for me to dress up and role play being a slutty school teacher with him. So, basically a present for himself.

His mum bought be a horrible lamp thing. It was a black box but stood up on one corner and then filled with peachy coloured stones that lit up. He was weirdly close to his mum so I couldn't say I didn't like it and I had to put it on display every time he came to my place.

Another ex-P bought me a Tesco pizza because I like pizza.

My now DH was going to present me with a gold hologram necklace with our Dds face in all it's 3D glory for me to wear on our wedding day. Luckily he showed Dsis who tactfully explained all jewelry was chosen for the big day. He did give it to me after, oh the horror, but it was given with such sweet intent, I bought an extra long chain so I could wear it but it was always hidden. I unfortunately conveniently lost it in a house move.

Now dh bought me a cuddly toy no idea why, have never shown any liking for them. It hasn't been repeated probably because I gave it to my little sister the same day.

Socks.

He was traveling in Chile. 'Finding himself'. And in 3 months the only thing he could one to send me was a pair of socks. ugly socks they were too.

Needless to say he didn't remain a boyfriend after that.

This memory now makes me smile.
It was my birthday and my dh had bought gifts and wrapped them.
He excitedly sat me down on the floor in a circle with our 4 dc. Age range 2-8 years.
Each child handed me a gift when it was their turn.
In order
Sexy undies
Sexy bra
Suspended belt
Stay up sexy lace stockings
I just looked at him like this
He was so proud of himself a mixture of
He passed away nearly 2 years ago.
Cheeky shit.

A coat hook that he made himself.

Don't ask me what that was all about

DH (in the very early days) once brought me a plastic Chef from Southpark air freshener that sang:

I'm gonna make love to you woman
Gonna lay you down by the fire

To be fair, he had very little money left after buying a bottle of wine to bring over & thought I'd like it.

I've still got it and we've been married 11 years

Sky diving voucher when I was newly pregnant which had a 10 month expiration funnily enough I never did it

A few years ago, DH and I bought each other the exact same present without knowing ... an outdoor pot plant holder in the shape of a dog .. very cute, now we have 2. My daughter knew what I was giving her Dad, and she knew what he was giving me, thought it was hysterically funny, but never let on.

A half finished tube of Burt's Bees hand cream he found in a skip

He was kind enough to run it under the tap before giving it to me.

I loved southpark chef, would of liked that gift. I got some silver Kenny earings once.

First gift was an old lady nightie like someone in a nursing home would wear!!

Another gift was his ex wife's perfume.

A butt plug for a big number birthday (though he did spoil me with other presents that I loved )

A date i went on brought me a mr men story book...Mr tickle I think it was.. He wrtoe inside he hoped we'd have loads of laughs. He was a nice enough guy but didn't do it for me.

A big bottle of pound shop perfume that had clearly already been used. I think it was called 'Desire' or something like that - classy guy!

Incredibly chunky silver chain, like the type of chain that guys wear. Really thick links. I saw it and knew it was over.

Love these threads...

Mine = A real live rabbit delivered to my work.

Never saw him again but the rabbit lived for 10 years despite its long list of health problems that cost me thousands in vet bills.

I once got MY OWN STUFF BACK for my birthday. Wrapped.

One year my (now ex) husband bought me a pair of scales, because he wanted some I was bought a Hoover another year and one year he forgot altogether!

My BF bought me this klaxon/bulb horn last Christmas. It's a pretty good present because every now and then, just when he's forgotten all about it, I honk him as he comes out the bathroom.

A minimiser bra. I was a 32C at the time.

A radiator key for Valentine's from my ex.

A small metal box like a mini samsonite case. Inside was a vibrator. It was Blue toothed so you could pair it to a mobile phone and activate it somehow through calling it on your phone, God knows how. Anyway it totally weirded me out and ended up on the skip when we moved

Yes, dear reader, I married him, I had to take him off the streets somehow