Brother has come out gay and no one dealing with it very well

[Star2015]

Hi all, thread attached, any comments would be helpful and greatly received.

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/lgbt_children/2514192-Brother-has-come-out-and-no-one-handling-it-well?msgid=57735252#57735252

I'm finding it hard to think that there would be the same level of sympathy for a poster talking about their difficulty accepting a sibling's black partner.

Sorry, OP, but surely what you and your parents have to do is own up to your feelings, examine them, and then tackle your 'unease' principally by getting over it? This is 2015. Sure, we still need Stonewall and the EHRC. But there's also gay marriage and plenty of families where there is no 'difficulty' at all.

What age are your parents, OP? I know that my parents- 59 and 68- wouldn't care at all, but I know that my grandparents- 85 and 83- would. They would cast anyone out of the family or anything, but I think they would struggle a bit with it.

Mother I said I mourned the life I thought we'd be having, which I believe - from having read threads on here and in RL - can be a common reaction. It wasn't drawn out, I didn't dress up in black for years a la Queen Vic, it was just something I thought when he told me. As I said, I am human and I shared what I felt. I believe that is what online anon forums are for...

Does your sister express her sexuality has her "choice"? I would have thought most gay people, like most straight people, would see their sexuality as pre-determined and not of their choosing.

In her case no: I've known a number of other people who would say that there is an element of political choice and/or social expedience in the way they express their sexuality.

But my sister, in any case, is a middle-aged parent of two. As are a lot of my friends of differing sexualities. There isn't a whole hell of a lot of difference in our lifestyles, really.