Oh dear, I had a bit of a red mist moment yesterday

[bran]

I'm feeling a bit silly today because of it. Please tell me I'm not the only one who manages to be calm and mature 99.9% of the time (may be exaggerating a bit there) and then completely looses it in the most childish way imaginable.

Should I tell you what I did or will you all think less of me?

lol rickman, I did something similar the other day. I was standing at a pedestrian crossing with my children, waiting for the green man, and there was a grubby red car with a really cross-looking scruffy couple having a blazing row. As soon as the green man appeared and I stepped out in to the road with the pushchair, the bloke put his foot down and screeched through the red light. I had to pull an old woman out of the way otherwise he would have hit her. Anyway, fat lot of goodi t did him- he had to stop about six feet away because of the queue for the Somerfield car park anyway. I was so angry I didn't feel I could just let it go, so I bellowed "Idiots! Idiots!" . I then thumped the back windscreen, twice - unfortunately they had a couple of big dogs in the back who went completely ballistic. I ran away quite quickly

PMSL at the coleslaw and grapefruit juice bran, sounds as though it served him right

I'm relieved at the lack of judgement. And I love everyone else's red mist moments too, especially charliecat's.

Poor dh, he does his best and he does loads for ds but he does generate a lot of work and I resent him for it sometimes. Since ds came I've been increasingly annoyed that he doesn't drive and thinks I have nothing better to do on a Saturday than drive him around or fetch and carry for him/his company.

Thanks for making me laugh bran! hahahaha. But I'd have made HIM clean it up, he was totally in the wrong and you were, of course, right, completely.

I have done similar, absolutely. We had a lovely friend and her 3 children coming to stay with us recently and when she phoned to say she was about 10 minutes away I informed her that I was, in fact, sitting in the car on a dual carriageway having screamed out of the house half an hour earlier. I can't even remember why I was so incensed now but anyway, I got back to friends having arrived (thank god I've known her a LONG time!) and dh muttering 'thanks, that's just great that is, now dd (who was 2) knows the expression 'fking hell' well done www (well, he used my real name)'

You are not alone. But in your position I'd leave him to fk up all on his own. But I can see that his disorganisation affects you, ds and your time so this would piss me off big time too. But hey, I've rarely been called a reasonable woman!

Provisional licence and a few lessons for Xmas bran

excellent!

Oh god, bran, I think you showed admirable restraint by not throwing the coleslaw at him. Well done on not hitting him or throwing anything at him, given the circumstances.

well,,,,,,lol where shall i start lol i have many red mist moments i have thown sauce pan lids and prawn crackers at dh he is never serious which if i not in good mood sparks me of on ome BIG TIME he calls me zelda which is a nasty old whitch like chatacter off an old cartoon called thunder hawks arghhhh i showing my age now CREEK wat kind of things have you all thrown

Thank you everyone, but really it wasn't big and it wasn't clever.

I have a theory that this stage of my life (small child stage) would always be stressful because of the kind of man that I'm attracted to. I like interesting, exciting, unpredictable, funny men, but they are of course not the kind of men who make your life easier when you have a pre-schooler. I like and admire the kind of man who would never combine coming home after midnight with forgetting his door key, a man who would not only change a nappy but also put the dirty one in the bin instead of leaving it where he will step on it the next time he passes that way, someone who doesn't leave the kitchen like a bombsite when he cooks, but I could never fancy someone like that.

The thought of spending my retirement years with someone who plans for every eventuality and knows what exactly he'll be doing tomorrow, next week and next year is much worse than the reality of living with someone who's a bit of a pain in the neck now. And dh is really very nice, really, really. Even if he did think that the early years of parenthood is as good a time as any to do a PhD and set up his own business.

It makes me wonder if, deep down, dh likes the kind of woman who covers his clothes in coleslaw.

Oh, and I'm smirking at dh loading the washing machine , even though it will go onto spin cycle just as we're trying to fall asleep. He's being quite martyr-like about it.

'Then the red mist came down and suddenly there was a mixed pile of coleslaw and clothes on the floor' - quote of the week surely?

bran, I would have killed him - I think you were very restrained.

I threw a glass of red wine over dh once (can't recall why) and it was immensely satisfying...even though I did have to repaint the wall the next day and we never did get the stain out of the settee.

Having 'endured' dh's MSc I have some idea of what it must be like to have a dh doing a PhD. In fact, dh has mentioned a couple of times that he would like to do a PhD and my response has always been "well, you'll do it on your own then because I'll leave rather than go through that again." It is so incredibly stressful - and family life does get put on hold while they write/read/research. Plus, I can't face the proof-reading...after the MSc I know more about chlamydia than I ever wished to know.

has he apologized yet? he needs to recognise the huge amount of work you do that lets him do his PhD.

I particularly like Charliecat's eyebrows standing on end.

But any woman's would, at that kind of provocation.

It could have been worse, Bran. Just don't have borscht for lunch until he has finished his PhD.

I don't use grapefruit juice.
I use Thai Fish Sauce.
And only in small amounts and only in dark crevices like pockets where it will only be detected by unidentifiable malevolent odour over the course of several days, if not weeks.

That's not red mist - that's psychopathic!!

PMSL! Sorting the washing into two piles before ruining his with the grapefruit is psycho-genius. I can just see the cold scary calmness now. The shining anyone?

I could see people posting on this thread last night, but I couldn't open it to have a look as dh was sitting beside me using the other computer. It can't be right though that you all agree with me, surely on a proper MN thread someone should be defending my dh as a man who works hard to do the best for his family (which he is) and telling me to stop being so lazy (which I am). Even those of you who think I'm psychopathic haven't actually said that I'm wrong. At the very least some smug parent should come along and point out that it's inconsistant parenting to spend months training ds not to throw food on the floor and then do the coleslaw thing in front of him.

SW, the fish sauce thing is sneaky, underhand and downright nasty, and I love it. I think a few drops could work very well in a pair of smart work shoes.

Myrrthamoo, I opted out of proof-reading when ds came along. I too have nasty memories of proof-reading MBA stuff in the early hours of the morning.

I threw a bag of M & S croissants at dh (then dp) in the street once, can't for the life of me remember what it was all about though.

As long as it was M&S croissants.

Just think, could have been Morrison's.

I can't say i've had any 'red mist' moments, but DP leaving his dirty clothes all over the floor was getting right on my tits, and then i thought to myself, why am i picking this up and washing it every day, then being annoyed at it? I told him that in future, if it wasn't it the basket, it wasn't getting washed. After about a week (and a big pile of socks and tshirts) lo and behold they appeared in the basket. 1 - nil to me.

Oh yes you need to have the best when having a set-to.

Once I poured a tin of paint on the carpet in protest about something. I think it was dh's nitpicking about cleanliness when he did none himself.

Well, the carpet needed to be replaced anyway, but it felt good.