Bit of background. Been a tough few years for me and dp. Multiple miscarriages, lost jobs, business going belly up. Through all this we have both not had the healthiest behaviours. Drinking too much, eating crap and smoking.
However the last 18 months have seen our fortunes much improved. We now have a gorgeous 5 month old. We have moved to a house in a town we love. Boozing well under control. Jobs going well. Joined weight watchers, diet much improved and weight coming off.
I haven't had a ciggie in well over 18 mos and am now vehemently anti smoking. DP has made multiple promises to stop, and does for weeks at a time, but then has a fag and before you know it he is back up to 10 a day. He is over 40, obese & has high blood pressure.
Tonight he is back smoking again, and I have basically said that is his choice, but don't expect a warm welcome from me and have pretty much ignored him for the rest of the evening. It was a shit end to a lovely night (turn on of christmas lights).
He thinks I am being too hard given all the progress he has made in other areas and that I should be more forgiving. I think it is bollocks to have a baby, particularly later in life, and choose to continue smoking. In my eyes he is choosing to smoke at the risk of shortening his life and leaving dd without a dad. My own dad had a massive heart attack when I was 17 (he survived). He was only 48. He smoked.
How do I handle this, particularly if he continues to smoke? I think he needs to see some immediate consequence for his choice, but I don't want to be childish and sulky. Any ideas?