I have a rather difficult relationship with my mother although she'd tell you how much she loves me. I live abroad and see her once every couple of years and talk on Skype once every 3/4 months. So no relationship at all from my perspective.
She does however follow me on Facebook and it's there that it's all kicked off.
My DD posted a be nice to ordinary muslims type article. My mum replied to it with a straight out of the Daily Mail rant about immigration highlighting all the (imaginary) faults with our adopted country and what danger everyone is in being here. DD was worried as she has AS and suffers with anxiety. I reassured her that it wasn't true and showed her the 'news' article that was being regurgitated.
Mother then starts arguing that it was true, that all the press in the UK are reporting that this country is in a mess and doesn't have a clue what it doing. That she's entitled to her opinion and I'm rude for shouting her down and ignoring her. I'm like FFS everyone we know in this country can see the shit your spouting about their country. You're embarassing us. STFU. She kept going so I defriended her because I don't have the mental energy to deal with her.
So now I've received a message from her saying it was never her opinion, she was just informing us of what was being reported. That I've hurt her by saying she was being rude and offensive and this upset has set her back in the mental health treatment she's recieving ... but she still loves me. She's also deleted all the offensive stuff so there's no record of what she said.
I feel like it's messing with my head. She posts offensive shit but then twists it so she's the victim when called out on it. Is this gaslighting?