So I've been with my DP for 7 years and we have 2 DCs, I'm in my late 20s and before him i had a few serious and casual relationships with other men. But now it gets complicated.. I am started to come to accept the fact that I think I have repressed my true sexuality for all this time, despite seeking out lesbian fiction and porn form around age 15 and my fantasies always involving women I always dismissed this as being normal.. looking back i didn't really fancy any boys for a long time at school but put it down to being a late developer. I did then have some pretty full on crushes on boys and then obviously boyfriends, though many of these started I think through my being flattered at the attention. I've never had an orgasm with a man, though plenty on my own! Physically I'm enjoying sex but there always seems to be a mental barrier i can't let down.
I'm so confused and recently I am obsessing about it, I feel like it is taking over my life, its all i can think about. I am constantly searching for lesbian related stuff online, watching films and tv shows with lesbians in. Whenever I see lesbian marriages or relationships on them it gives me this happy warm feeling inside. ARGH.. I don't know what to do. I'm not sure what advice I'm after, I just needed to write that down and get it off my chest. Ive always been of the sexuality is fluid I'm probably bisexual even though i haven't been with a woman, now I'm thinking I'm maybe completely gay and missing out on being truly happy.