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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

OMFG: am a divorce cliché (long and ranty)

57 replies

Handywoman · 08/11/2015 21:12

So 2.5yrs I called time on my EA marriage.

Am in the family home. My name on the deeds. He pays maintenance. Divorce plodding because he struggles to actually fill in forms and follow instructions but sort of happening and I've just received the draft consent order.

I work in a rewarding career I trained hard (harder than most given zero support) for but I work EOW and on call 2-3 times overnight per month.

He has a relationship with the dc which is great. But never bothers with them of his own volition. Can't make them a packed lunch. Can't be arsed with parents eve/concerts or to be involved with their lives as an Actual Parent. Having the dc is all part of fluffing up his Narc image. Everyone says what a great guy he is (all front I might add, there is literally nothing of any depth beneath - my therapist refers to him as 'very emotionally damaged') and he has gone off and re-invented himself, given himself a ridiculous hipster makeover, has an new/extensive circle of mates and a girlfriend. And a fucking stupid moustache. He now turns up at my house wearing dungarees which for a fat 45 year old is frankly hilarious.

He is about to move into a swanky new house up the road with the new gf more fool her the new house is nearer the school that dd1 attends and that dd2 will soon go to.

To date he has had the dc while I work. I've started a slightly different job meaning I'm now down to 2 on calls a month both being on a weekend due to new work pattern. So atm he sees them for one night EOW and that's it (while I'm working and on call). I literally either work or have the dc. He never thinks or wants to have the dc on any particular occasion. If I want him to have the dc the Fri before a work weekend I have to ask and he is often busy, like this week when he said he had other plans. This week was the first time he'd had them since 25th Oct except for Thurs I was desparate to go out (had OLD planned) so instructed him to take the dc to the fireworks.

I've done counselling for a year and psychoanalytic therapy since Jul. Last week's session left me feeling very vulnerable and dejected. I've been feeling strung out and left with absolutely fuck all opportunity to have a life and really look after mySELF unless I pull out all the stops and get babysitters to snatch the odd few hours where I can get out. I long to just get out an let my hair down! At the moment I feel desperate inside. My bestie lives in this town, I used to see her every week, we've seen each other through thick and thin. But lately she doesn't have so much time for me. I felt down this week (has brief chat to bestie about this). I messaged her during my working day yest. to see if she was in for a cuppa. No reply (unheard of).

Another friend invited me for coffee yesterday morning. We used to have loads in common, do lots together. She left her EA STBXH 6 yrs ago. Since meeting someone online she is now happily coupled up (am happy for her, obv) but while I was there she and her husband kept play-bickering with each other about how 'hard the other one is to live with' (in that annoying smug way) it was actually all quite tense with no girly catchup time and I left with a sigh of relief rather than feeling 'how nice to catch up with X'.

This evening my kids came home full of the joys of having lunch with my bestie, her kids and other mutual friends (one of whom is having a 40th b'day this weekend which I WAS looking forward to). I cried and cried alone in the bathroom while running dd2's bath.

STBXH asked yesterday if he would mind if we all (him, me, his gf) go to mutual friend's b'day (so he can fluff his Narc image a bit more) and be happy mates. Fuck that for a laugh. I wouldn't mind but I have no respect for me ex as his is a joke of a parent and takes Zero responsibility. I mean - Zero. He will be feign surprise when I tell him the kids are off school at Xmas and need childcare - no joke. For the first time I feel broken and rejected and like fucking them all off.

No time to myself and friends drifting off and I get to watch EA STBXH go off into the sunshine with his new beard and look like the sun shines out of his arse and carry on being on coupley with mutual friends while I get the dregs - work. or kids.

Have told ex I want to have a convo with him in the pub (so I can broach the idea of him stepping the fuck up) but I'm fearful he'll just be his usual nasty self and just refuse to do any more.

I'm a fecking Divorce Cliché. What next - purchase lots and lots of cats???????

Oh lord. That was So lonnnnnnnng. Someone, AF, anyone, slap me round the face and Help me to Man up and get Outa This Hole.

OP posts:
longdays · 08/11/2015 22:42

The best thing I did after my divorce was to stop giving my ex any power over me. He's blocked on all social media, i don't ask about his life and I don't volunteer anything about mine at all. Any organising of childcare etc is all done via email to avoid him attempting to shout me down.

My DD (6) is rapidly figuring him out and can see through him. I've changed his details on my phone to "IDIOT EX".

Seeyounearertime · 08/11/2015 22:50

After my divorce I change exs contact name to 'X' and every time she txt I'd reply after an hour with,
"Who is this?"
Grin
For some reason she found it less funny than I did.

Handywoman · 08/11/2015 22:55

My kids feel they can't ask him anything. Ever. Not for money, toys, nothing.

At said fireworks display this week dd1 wanted to meet up with her friend there. But she felt she shouldn't ask her dad because he would 'probably feel annoyed because he hasn't seen me for ages'

I told her if he's not seen her for ages it's absolutely NOT her fault.

But it just goes to show how messed up it all is and that I am the 100% de facto 'go to' only Person from whom Demands Can Be Made.

It's so messed up.

OP posts:
Movingonmymind · 08/11/2015 23:03

Super Mario AND fat moustachioed dungaree man, fucking hilarious Grin oh op, he sounds hideous but laughable. Hope that helps. And i can see-d--h going the same way. Though possibly less fetchingly...

starlight2007 · 08/11/2015 23:12

I am not sure how old your children are but I would be very careful.

If this man is EA the kids are too frightened to ask for anything why do you want them there?

Do you really think you would have a nice time knowing the kids aren't happy..

I am LP and my Ds doesn't see Dad...2 years ago I made a new years resolution to get a babysitter..I only go out every couple of months but it really recharges my batteries..

I also go out once every 6 months with some school mums because I am not esp close to them I never talk about my problems simple have a nice time..

Timetorethink · 08/11/2015 23:16

The Super Mario idea is fabulous. I am going to change my EA exp to a new name. I have not decided what yet, but it will make it almost a pleasure when he contacts me whinging about something (most recent one was could he put store of his stuff in my garage - errr - no .... Hmm )

Definitely go down the route of getting extra money from him if he is not willing to have the kids overnight more often. At least you can use it on a babysitter. It would, of course, be nice if he stepped up and actually did the proper dad thing.

Good luck [santa]

PreemptiveSalvageEngineer · 09/11/2015 00:54

I luffs you all. Now I am crying because of THAT!

Well, feck, there's just no pleasing you, is there... >tchah< Xmas Grin

PreemptiveSalvageEngineer · 09/11/2015 00:54

PS if you're far away from Scotland, are you near SarfEssex?

Handywoman · 09/11/2015 01:01

Ooh getting much warmer (about 1hr away) am home counties innit. Can we get together and make Voodo dolls???

OP posts:
bettyberry · 09/11/2015 01:50

OP I have nothing at all to add that is helpful but when you mentioned him wearing dungarees, having a moustache/beard thing going on I couldn't help but think of the bearded guy with clown make up in the Devil's Rejects! Grin

Maybe you could use the scary clown face as his picture on your phone!

My Ex went through the Spike from Buffy phase when we split only Real Old looking Spike. Then he had fake Blue with silvery bit dreads put in his hair with an undercut during his cybergoth thing! He took up mixed martial arts because I started kick boxing again. Then he had a really bad tattoo on the back of his neck I'm pretty sure he meant to give the impression 'I'm hard' he hardly ever was btw and now he sports saggy jowls, a bald head, wears an unbranded black tracksuit and looks like the greasy Bouncer you'd do anything to avoid in a club. Poor bastard is only 33 and he thought he looked hot.

I may have put on a few stone since we split but oh boy I still have my 'looks' Grin

TooSassy · 09/11/2015 03:48

I have visions of super mario like ageing men on skateboards whizzing round the country!

OP, hugs. The law is honestly quite questionable at times in this country. If they don't want to see their DC's/ be utterly self involved, nothing we can do. Get the extra maintenance and get a babysitter once a week.

Don't be meeting him in a pub. That's too nice of you!

Hobbitwife001 · 09/11/2015 08:55

Feel for you, OP, this stuff is so shit isn't it, I changed my stbxh to 'knobhead' on my phone and email, no chance of not knowing who that might be....

Bubbletree4 · 09/11/2015 09:04

If you purchase cats, they will shit in your neighbours gardens and them your neighbours will resent you.

But seriously you are in a rough patch. You will come through it, your kids will know that you were the one who was there for them and you have your career. It is shit at the moment, but it often is when you need to put in hard graft for long term gains, in terms of family or work. Your ex's life is superficial - looks good on the outside, do you think his GF is lucky to have the twat? Do you think twat had changed his spots and is nice?

SoDiana · 09/11/2015 09:25

Super mario. Fn genius! Grin

Handywoman · 10/11/2015 16:30

Just walking the dog and a text popped up from SuperMario confirming our meeting later on.

It made me absolutely roar with laughter.

I'm going into battle with The Narcissist. Some would say that's foolish.

Wish me luck.

OP posts:
Seeyounearertime · 10/11/2015 16:34

Good luck OP.

www.a4at.com/blog/media/blogs/b/mario_280x530.jpg

Grin
meddie · 10/11/2015 16:48

I wouldn't be able to stop myself saying " It's a meee Marrio " in an over the top Italian accent every time I saw him in his dungarees.

On a serious note, its shit and you cant force them to be an involved parent how every much you try, saying the kids will realise when they get older doesn't help you cope with that daily grind of working and childcare, I remember vividly that climbing the walls feeling.

I hope you do get some me time, where you can be Handywoman, instead of mum or daughter or colleague.It just makes it that bit bearable, do you have a local gingerbread group or even a babysitting circle, so you can access an alternative source of childcare, just a few hours a week to yourself can keep you sane

SoDiana · 10/11/2015 16:53

Pmsl

Why do I find this so amusing lol

I'd call the ow sonic the hedgehog

Handywoman · 10/11/2015 16:53

Seeyou that's the avatar I've attached to his contact in my phone.

His text stands out in all its technicolor, Narcissistic glory. It's so very apt.

I've just put on my kick-ass high heeled boots.

OP posts:
Seeyounearertime · 10/11/2015 17:02

kick-ass high heeled boots

Be sure to not "accidentally" step on his foot with a stiletto heels. Grin

LonnyVonnyWilsonFrickett · 10/11/2015 17:12

Do you know what, I am usually all for counselling and taking time out to work on yourself etc etc, but in your case I think - take that cash and spend it on a babysitter once a week, and get yourself down the pub or something. You're bloody hilarious, you'll have new pals dropping off you before you can say 'Super Mario on a mother funking skateboard.'

Any chance of making some school gate friends? Not for life-long friendship, but a friend of mine who is both great at offering favours (childcare) and scrupulous about returning them, manages to get a hell of a lot of socialising done.

Take the power away from Mario. He is nothing to you, nothing to your kids.

Mama1980 · 10/11/2015 17:45

Good luck op. 20 years ago I was your dc, believe me when I say they are better off without him, they'll see that soon enough.
And just to add to the imagery the last time my biological father tried to turn up and play dad he got out of a brand new sports car wearing...leather trousers. we (my siblings and I) couldn't stop laughing for a week.

meddie · 10/11/2015 18:22

My ex turned up for one of his rare (once in 3 year visits) in a massive hummer wearing a leather jacket, with fringing along the arms and ornate embossed cowboy boots with a cuban heel. My pelvic floor barely held in there.

mum2mum99 · 10/11/2015 18:30

lol about cats. I have a pussy does it count?

Handywoman · 10/11/2015 22:32

Ok so: this was big (bearing in mind we haven't sat down and talked since Oct 2013 when I told him I wanted to divorce him for unreasonable behaviour (since agreed to wait two yrs).

I was dispassionate and calm,he was surprisingly receptive to the fact that the current situation is unbalanced.

And he agreed to my proposal - two nights EOW and every Tues night. He is moving in with gf next week to a lovely property. He says he would need his gf to be on board with the school morning because he can't really do them, but that she's currently not working and it should be fine. He didn't really like the idea of giving up Fridays but said yes.

We also managed to discuss the kids and how they are doing. For the first time since June 2013.

He asked me if I had decided whether I'm ok with me, him and gf going to mutual friend's party this weekend. I told him I hadn't decided. I'm naturally very frosty and business-like with him - makes him incredibly, INCREDIBLY uncomfortable Smile I am likely the only person who does not buy the Narc front and it unnerves him. I can't trust him so can't feign friendship. He is so uncomfortable that when I just went to walk out the pub after a polite 'bye' he had to grab me for a 'hug' - he can't STAND it!

Pretty soon after getting home he texts to say: 'great news! gf can do Tues mornings while she's out of work'

At which point I pointed out that the morning that follows Tuesday is known as Wednesday.

And then I am thinking oh fuck, here we go,I'm home 10mins and its already 'conditional'.

So I thought feck that. And texted something along the lines of 'gf new job will hope fully work around your commitments, to your contact, to your kids, she isn't there to help me' and that I am not unreasonable.

At that point I was working on the assumption that it's obvious that he and gf need to collaborate in their new family life. AND THEN I REMEMBERED MY 14 YEAR MARRIAGE AND DID A MASSIVE FACEPALM.

He still thinks he's 'doing me a favour'!

And of course now i don't trust that I've got anything particularly solid or committed out of it.

And I'm back to watching and waiting and seeing how he behaves.

And I suppose that's just how it is when your ex is a Narc Confused

plus ca change.......

Oh -my SuperMario avatar is a bit too striking and dd1 saw it and kept asking 'Who is SuperMario'

He wasn't wearing his dungarees tonight. Shame.

OP posts:
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