I'm in need of advice I'm at my wits end.
Me and partner have been together over 6 years and have a DC aged 3.
Our relationships gone threw sheer hell since my DC has been born.
- MIL being a cow
- lack of support from him when child was a baby
- I was going threw uni and we're currently are trying to save for a mortgage.
- found out his mom was not his mom and that it was another family member.
- his dad died recently.
Since then he had changed totally. I understand why this would effect him and ive tried to be as supportive as I can but where do I draw a line under it.
He says he's fine and it doesn't bother him as he can see why his real mom lied ect. she's not brilliant about it... She's all about her and woe me and hasn't really apologised for what she did but hey...
My main reason is our relationship is done. I know it is but I try and hold on because I feel bad if I walk away especially as I believe he's changed due to all the family issues.
We both work full time on different shifts. So we don't see each other all week.
He gets 3/4 hours a day alone time after DC goes to school. I get no me time all week due to no childcare ect. So I do feel resentful and have told him about this. I don't get no support with this as I have to beg him to take DC out so I can have some precious few hours.
He does help out around the house and I acknowledge that and appreciate it. He could do more as he has more
Time than me but.
We argue a lot over so many things. Mainly the fact is he leave everything to me to do... Mainly with our DC. He doesn't take him anywhere or do anything with him. He shows no interest in things for our DC unless I pursue the issue. I'm constently late for work as he's not getting out of bed in the morning and my son wants me in the morning and not him.
He never texts me when I'm at work and his excuse is he's busy..: but he gets 3 hours of free time? He never rings me anymore on his lunch break. I can go the whole day without him getting in contact with me first.
I've showed him call records and texts and he can't say anything.
He moans about lack of sex but I do a stressful job and because we see each other for 3 days a week it feels so planned and most the time I'm knackered.
I have to ask him to do things over and over like registering to vote. It ended up someone coming to our house to give him a final notice because he didn't do it. And then he asked me to do it? When it takes all of 2 mins. He can't seem to take control or responsibility of things.
I've asked him to do couple counselling and counselling for
Himself as he has told me he feels emotionally empty. But he's point blanked refused and says he doesn't have a problem. He doesn't face any issue if he can help it. I've told him countless times the relationship is breaking down and he tells me no other man would do as much around the house as him and I'm delusional. And I expect to much and I will never find it. But is it to much to ask for him to communicate. He doesn't plan anything for us to do on a weekends and it's all left to me. Otherwise we would stay in week after week and I do t want that for my DC
He's been to Amsterdam this year with his friends and goes out more than me. And I allow this.
I just feel isolated, alone and pissed off. I feel like he turns everything on me to the point I question if I am being unreaosnable But at the same time I don't want to walk away if he's changed due to things not being his fault and the fact it's due to life's challenges. Maybe we would be better if we both worked days but I don't know if I'm clutching at straws.
Is it me :(