DH acting dodgy

[Slobberdobber]

DH goes to the pub every Thurs night with a group of (male) friends from a team sport he plays. Usually he wats apps me a bit to tell me when he'll be home or how he got on that day (as he goes straight from work.) He's normally very very chatty on wats app and is always in touch.

Last night at about 11pm he became decidedly quiet and not very chatty. I asked if everything was all right and he said "yes, there's something interesting I have to tell you, but I can't tell you now." I said Oh please, tell me. And he said "no, no I really can't tell you now. I'll tell you later."

I ended up falling asleep and woke up this morning. DH was lying next to me and I wasn't sure what time he'd got in as I didn't wake up, but when I checked my wats apps he'd sent me some messages saying he was on his way home at 3.30am. The wats apps were also things like "I love you so much" and "this song reminds me of you" and sending me you tube links etc. Which is odd, for him. While he's chatty, he's not mushy, and we're not getting on that well at the moment, so it was odd, that sudden turn.

Anyway, we finally got a chance to speak today after school run and he said "do you not want to hear what happened?" I said yes, go on then. So he told me this:

A friend of his (a friend I find very shady - from DH's old partying days when he was single) had called him and asked him where he was. He told him he was at the pub, and that friend turned up at the pub and wanted to speak to him alone. He said that friend had a bag of money with a substantial amount in it and told DH that he needed to hide it and please could DH take it and DH refused.

Me: so that's it?
Him: what? That's interesting, isn't it?
Me: Where is the money from?
Him: I don't know. You know he and his wife are going through a separation?
Me: No. So is he hiding the money from his wife?
Him: I don't know
Me: so what was your conversation then?
Him: Just how he needed me to take the money for a while.

I then asked him what time he got home, and he said 1.30am. I said, no you didn't, because your wats apps are from 3.30am. He said "well it might've been later than that, but it wasn't 3.30 and wats app sometimes gets the timestamp wrong."

I said - where did you go from when the pub closed to when you came home? He said he went to a bar (we're in a major city.)

If I'm really giving him the benefit of the doubt with this, and he lost track of time etc, then, why doesn't he have more detail about what exactly his friend wanted him to do with the money if they spent 4.5hours talking about it??

He is also being really, really loving and all over me, and I find it all a bit dodgy tbh. The reason we are not getting on well at the moment is because I am feeling like he is making all the decisions and I am losing control of my life. It could be that this particular incident is pricking my radar because I feel like it's yet another example of losing control of what's going on in our lives and feeling decisions are made without my awareness.

Do you think I sound overly forensic and picky?

DH is not at all defensive or annoyed that I am suspicious and he is laughing when I tell him he is acting oddly and saying "I told you I had something to tell you and this is it. It's gossip - I thought you'd like it. My friend is obviously up to something!"

I checked his wallet - there is nothing apart from a receipt for drinks at the pub that he said he was at, at 11pm.

Am I being paranoid and weird? or is something weird going on? I am aware that I am especially sensitive at the moment to decisions being made without me. Please give me some perspective?

[Branleuse]

im not really sure what youre suspicious about. It sounds like you guys have a nice chatty relationship.