Is going NC the only way

[november2015]

I left ex 18 months ago due to affair no 4 (he is currently seeing the childminder who was affair no 3). We did have a business together which I resigned from to try and have less contact with him but he still contacts me a lot.

We have 2 DC together who he has paid no maintenance for (which is currently going through the CMS) and his contact with them is irregular.

Yet every day, sometimes several times a day he has an excuse to make contact and cause problems. Yesterday was especially bad as he wanted me to lend him some money for something and when I refused, he started saying how I had ruined the chance of us being together again.

Has anyone just said "stuff the consequences, I am just not going to have any contact with him anymore". The consequences for me would probably be that I would have to sell our family house and maybe move areas.

Please tell me your positive stories....

Why would you need to sell the family home and move areas? Have you been to see a solicitor yet? You need to find out what your rights are before you start making any rash decisions.

Ignore all contact with your ex unless it is in regard to the children. Sound like you are well rid of him!

Why would you have to sell up?

A couple of reasons - we both own 50% and I would not be able to take the mortgage over just myself. I am currently up to date with payments but he won't sign the house over to me so I am aware that I am paying for something that he will take 50% of when sold.

The other thing is the mortgage payments will be a struggle on my own.

While the house may be in joint names this doesn't necessarily mean that you both have an equal interest in it as, presumably, you will need to provide another home for yourself and the dc if it's sold.

Make an apointment with a solicitor who specialises in family law and who offers a free initial consultation as you should have a greater share in the equity if the house is sold.

Are you abe to take in a short term lodger or paying guest to help make ends meet?