If you came to realise you were a pushover in previous relationships and allowed yourself to be walked over/stood up etc what happened when you saw the light?
The reason I ask is because after my last serious relationship ended I spent a lot of time alone reading, reading and more reading. Namely baggage reclaim, and mumsnet.
I realised that as much as I had the misfortune to meet unsuitable (unkind) men repeatedly it was just as much my fault for forgiving poor behaviour and not calling time on men a lot sooner.
A few examples. I went out with a man who used to plan things with me and stand me up repeatedly citing last minute work or he fell asleep. The same man used to dump me for a few weeks (usually to chase someone else) then send out fishing texts and reel me back in 
I met someone this year and for the first time in my life there is no drama and its all very very lovely.
I am determined that if he were to give me just one incident of shoddy behaviour I would end it. But its come as a surprise to find that at my late-ish age I seem to be in a relationship that does not cause me any angst.
I'm just curious as to whether I have just been lucky enough to finally meet a decent man or whether I am giving off a different vibe as it were.
I'd be interested to know whether anyone else ever came to a 'what the hell was I like' moment and found happiness?
Fwiw when I realised how much crap I had tolerated and allowed I felt a lot happier about facing the future as a long term single too. I think I valued myself more realised that no relationship is better than a crap relationship , so when I say found happiness I mean as a single or in a new partnership.