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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Separated from an EA alcoholic

2 replies

ToddlerTantrums · 27/10/2015 23:26

As in the title, iv recently left my DH.
It's been such a long time coming I don't really know where to start but I feel like I need a huge ramble to get it out.
He has always been a heavy drinker, I suppose I didn't realise how bad it was till we had our DC. He's never done a night feed as he'd be passed out. No interest in family days out as he couldn't drink there.
Started getting worse as time went on, things like pushing me (never as far as actually hitting) and just really letting go of his appearance, work etc all in favour of drinking.
I stayed as he always had an excuse, bad time at work/house move/new job/ blah blah. I stupidly believed he could change. Fast forward to DC2, he pushed me over when I was heavily pregnant, and I really thought this is it. This is what will stop him. It wasn't.
Iv gone though such a shit time with him over the last few years since DC2, arguing daily about his drinking/lying/hiding it.
He then installed CCTV cameras in the house to watch meduring the day?! I still have absolutely no idea what the hell this was about.
In the end he was regularly too drunk to look after the kids and I worked nights. I had to call in 2ce in a week as I couldn't leave the kids with him, and it was the final straw.

I don't really know what I'm after by posting here. Iv had to block his number etc because I'm getting so much abuse from him and my head is just a mess.
I am kicking myself reading this back for staying for so long!

OP posts:
Seeyounearertime · 27/10/2015 23:36

Well done I say.
His loss, tale some time, sort your head and yourself and if, IF, you decide you want another guy then find one that fits your life. If you stay single, build hobbies and friends that fit in.

It's an end to a relationship, start if a life.

And if he keeps sending messages or calling then cal the police, hard!ent is a serious issue and they will talk to him if he oversteps the mark.

ToddlerTantrums · 28/10/2015 14:59

Thanks seeyou. I know it made the right choice. Not having any contact the last few days has been amazing. Mildly pissed off that he hasn't called the DCs but just shows how much he's bothered about contact and how it's so much more to do with getting at me

OP posts:
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