Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Flip

1 2

Original poster

cant get hold of my boyfriend - really worried

38 replies

milliemol6 · 26/10/2015 15:04

he has a lot going on at the moment and he said he would ring me this morning, we were up until late texting last night but we need to speak on the phone. anyway, he hasn't rung me today, he hasn't ready any whatsapp messages so hes not been online and his phone is only going to answer machine.

im worried sick. i dont want to contact his mum or go to his house in case he doesn't want his mum involved...im really worried though because its not like him to not have his phone with him/use it.

what do i do? im waiting for him to get in touch, ive sent a few texts which is daft cos he hasnt read them, but do i give it until tomorrow and then contact a friend or something? x

OP posts:

Stinkilinky · 26/10/2015 15:07

Does he live with his mum? If not I would pop by just to make sure he's okay

Seriouslyffs · 26/10/2015 15:07

Can you see whether he's on Facebook? If you message him does it show when he was last online? Does he live with his Mum?

BeeRose30 · 26/10/2015 15:11

If he said he'd call but hasn't, and you've not heard from him since last night I don't think it's unreasonable to contact his mum or go round to see if he's home.

I've been in your position so I know what a dreadful feeling it is waiting.

Morganly · 26/10/2015 15:12

It's far too soon for this level of worry. You said he's busy. You were texting until late last night. Chill.

Original poster

milliemol6 · 26/10/2015 15:13

he lives with his mum. he hasnt been on facebook since last night, the same time he sent the last text to me.

i don't know whether to leave it until the evening or what, he never ever turns his phone off like this. im petrified and thinking the worse :( he promised he would ring me this morning, not today, he said this morning.

OP posts:

BeeRose30 · 26/10/2015 15:14

Can you be more specific about what you're afraid has happened?

Original poster

milliemol6 · 26/10/2015 15:19

im not sure, i just know he feels really down at the minute. i cant imagine him doing anything stupid but at the same time he really is not one to just disappear like this. he is usually glued to his phone.

OP posts:

loopylou6 · 26/10/2015 15:19

Do you have a particular reason to be so worried? Hi said you are not sure if he'd want his mum involved - involved in what?

spidergurl · 26/10/2015 15:20

Unless you have some specific reason to worry about him (drugs? Depression?) then I think this us a bit much. Have you had an argument?

loopylou6 · 26/10/2015 15:20

you not hi

AnyFucker · 26/10/2015 15:21

Not getting the panic here. He is a grown man, yes ?

if you are worried enough to think he might have harmed himself, then stop fannying around on the internet and go round there/get someone else to

GilbertBlytheWouldGetIt · 26/10/2015 15:21

His phone might be broken. Is it his only method of accessing the internet?

Seriouslyffs · 26/10/2015 15:22

How old is he? Does he work? A teenager in half term is less worrying than someone in their 30s who works...
Although anyone can leave their phone at home!

ElsaAintAsColdAsMe · 26/10/2015 15:22

His phone might be broken, he may have forgotten to charge it, he might just need a bit of space for a few hours or feel poorly.

I think you may be over reacting, unless there is more of a back story here.

BeeRose30 · 26/10/2015 15:23

Does he work/study? Is it possible that he just doesn't feel like talking to anyone atm and is therefore not taking calls and messages?

Try not to worry. Find something to do to distract yourself.

Coconutty · 26/10/2015 15:23

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BeeRose30 · 26/10/2015 15:24

"if you are worried enough to think he might have harmed himself, then stop fannying around on the internet and go round there/get someone else to"

^^agree with this from AF

Vix270781 · 26/10/2015 15:28

I second just distracting yourself and getting on with your day. I am terrible for this kind of thing but every time there's an explanation as to what's happened which leaves you feeling just a bit silly after imagining all sorts! As some of the other posters have said, unless there's more to it than you've told us, try not to worry and get on with your day.

BlackAmericanoNoSugar · 26/10/2015 15:41

Whenever I can't get hold of someone I assume that they have left their phone somewhere or run out of charge. I am invariable right, except for one time that I was cursing H for leaving his phone in the office and it turned out it had been snatched from him by a thief on a bicycle.

MackerelOfFact · 26/10/2015 15:45

Sounds to me like it's just a phone problem; maybe it's broken, maybe he's doing a big software update, maybe he's turned it onto aeroplane mode by accident, maybe his sim has been deactivated - these are all reasons I know I've been off-radar for a day or so at a time in the past!

Do you have a landline number or work number/email address?

Fairenuff · 26/10/2015 15:52

If I wanted to get hold of someone and they weren't answering their phone, I would phone the house phone/mum's phone and ask to speak to him. What's wrong with doing that OP? Really not getting all the angst here

mudandmayhem01 · 26/10/2015 15:53

I once forgot that dh had agree to do a double shift ( he had told me) phone switched off at work, managed to convince myself if he had an accident on his bike on the way home, was on the verge of ringing hospitals and then walked in the house as nothing had happened, well it hadn't ( six hours late in my eyes or on time in his) there is normally a completely rational explanation for these things

riverboat1 · 26/10/2015 15:54

He could have lost his phone, lost his charger, gone somewhere and had it nicked, gone somewhere and forgotten it, dropped it and broken it, split water on it and broken it...

If you actually need to speak to him about something important, or you are genuinely worried about him doing something stupid, pop round to his house/work if you can.

Fairenuff · 26/10/2015 15:55

This might be a fairly modern thing. Expecting to be able to contact people instantly/anytime/anywhere just wouldn't have been an option before mobile phones were in common use.

I expect plenty of people can't remember a time like that.

MockTheWeek · 26/10/2015 16:05

I would be the same as you, OP. I have a very overactive imagination when it comes to things like this. Are you in a position to send a quick text to his mum just saying that you haven't heard from him today and just wanted to check he's ok?

Flip

1 2

Swipe left for the next trending thread