I want to be the best parent I can be and I want to find a way of striking a balance as do parents.
Is as left for somebody else, I am only really bringing that up because I wanted to say that I've never used the children as ammunition or a sure fire way to hurt there father back - I know plenty that do and I just didn't want to be immature or play god with my children.
So I've sucked up the hurt, greeted their father politely, kept him informed of the children's schooling and important things and excepted his contact arrangements. I don't ask him for anything else.
We get on very well, there is no hostility and I would say we both ensure the children see comfortable handovers etc.
I feel a lot of guilt though, we talk a lot and some times not about the children just generic life really. I think atleast weekly we have a big catch up.
It's innocent. He is a very good dad and in actual fact a not very bad ex either, he wants to do right by the family he left and does go above and beyond for us. It did take him a good while to settle down from grisly ogre though.
We've had a few afternoons of family time and in a few weeks it has been suggested that we all go for an all day day trip with the children, part of me would be happy to accept we are just like two old friends who happen to have children but the other wonders whether his girlfriend is being informed of this ?
She hasn't met the children or his family yet.
I don't want to be the cause of angst in somebody else's relationship and I don't want to be blamed for his "over" interest in the family he left.
I do however want to get it right for my children, I want them to look back and say that their needs came first and we didn't do anything to add to their upset or upheaval.
How do you co parent and is it easier to very much just parent separately?