it's best not to ask, isn't it?

[CherryPicking]

I've been dropped by a friend - not a very close one. There are two reasons I can think of, and one of them is fair enough really. The other one is to do with my relationship with someone else.

If this frirnd knows the truth about what was said then no explanations are really needed from me, and I'll just have to put it down to this friend not being as inclusive in terms of diversity, as I would have thought. The other possible explanation is that she's heard a distorted version of events and made up her own mind that I was in the wrong. If so, do I bother trying to set the record straight?
Part of me feels like I just need to accept she doesn't like me any more. I really like her, but that's beside the point, isn't it?

You're making this into something in your head that it may not be/have been.

Talk to her.

Just let it go.

The thing is, being kind and compassionate is almost this person's brand - its what she's known for being dropped by her is like confirmation I'm a cunt. And not in the sense of having depth and warmth myself.

Friends come & go during a lifetime

You will never know what someone else is thinking

You dont know fully what goes on in other peoples lives - your friend may have more important things that she or he needs to be doing at this point in time

May be you both need time & space & you may be friends again in the future

May be one or both of you should be apologising ?

If it's the first thing I mentioned, I definitely have apologised more than once, to her, and it was years ago and we've had quite a few good times together since then. If it's the second thing - well it's not something anyone should have to apologise for in 2015.

What is it? had to ask, sorry

Don't want to out myself but basically im not straight. and I told someone I liked that I liked them. This person is someone we both know and is also single, so not sure why it would be such an issue unless there's some biphobia going on, or she heard a distorted version of events. We're all old enough to deal with such things in a grown up way, I would have hoped.

It doesn't need to be 'biphobia.'

If I heard that a man likes me, and I didn't like him in that way, then I would cool off towards him too. It's just life.

So if your friend liked one of your friends who didn't like them back, you'd ditch the friend who was doing the liking? Seems a bit unfair - liking people is perfectly legal y'know...

Personally, if the boot was on the other foot I'd offer compassion and a 'don't worry, you'll find the right person'.

Ask her or let it go, all this hypothesising is reall quite pointless.

Isn't that what mn is for?

And my op was asking which of those options I should choose. Just going 'do either of them already' isn't something I find massively helpful.

By asking her I feel I'd be doing a variation on the 'pick me dance'.

Do you want to be friends with her? If so you need to put some effort into finding out what's gone on and sorting things out; trying to second guess what she's thinking is a waste of time. It's not a pick me dance, it's an attempt to save something you think is worthwhile.

If you're not bothered whether you remain friends then just let it go, as again trying to second guess what she's thinking is a waste of time.

I am bothered, but don't want to look needy, obvs.

I'm now thinking its better to walk awayaway quietly with some dignity, considering this is really a double rejection.

I'm not sure i understand the double rejection you refer to but for me it's not needy to contact her and say: we seem to have fallen out, did i do something to upset you? However, if she clearly says yes I'm angry because of x and i no longer want to be friends, then continuing to chase her would be needy.

I guess I feel I've already been rejected by the person I had feelings for and the knock on effect of that is being rejected by someone else who knows us both, possibly because of my sexual orientation.