Can 2 passive aggressive people have a relationship

[bobsintime]

My BF and I both exhibit passive aggressive behaviour when we're stressed. We've been together for a couple of years and the first 18 months or so were great, we were getting to know each other, thought everything the other did was amazing etc etc. Then we both had quite stressful periods at work at the same time and the passive aggressiveness started on both sides. It got to the point where things were unbearable between us and we've just had a month break to try and stop the patterns of behaviour we had got into. We're meeting this week to talk things through and see if it's worth giving things another go. I adore the guy that i first met and realise that my behaviour is contributing to the problem, I'm willing to try and behave differently. Does anyone have stories of making it work with a passive aggressive partner when your default behaviour is the same?

Has he also accepted the need to change his own behaviour? If so, then I'd think you have a chance. If not, I really wouldn't be hopeful.

I don't think there is no such thing as a passive aggressive person. There is passive aggressive behaviour. And everyone exhibits passive aggressive behaviour. It is what happens when true feelings emerge when we are unwilling to communicate them in a more straightforward way. Some do it more than others, but it is a universal. It seems you have a bit of an unhealthy pattern going here. Would be easier if you gave some examples, but being really straightforward and honest in your communication is the way to overcome this. So instead of going quiet or being late, or eyerolling, or other behaviour you do to sabotage something your partner wants, you both need to make clear your feelings, owning them (important) in a non-accusing non-judgmental way. Then there is no need for the passive aggressive display of feelings to come out because everything is out in the open.

Sorry just noticed double negative. I meant: I don't think there is such a thing as...