Do you cut off people who are unkind and spiteful towards you?

[TotallyAnnoyingFamily]

I have just cut off two so-called friends who actually weren't being very nice about me behind my back, and there were a lot of spiteful undertones.

I hung in there, and hung in there, and actually probably made myself look an idiot by putting up with their behaviour.

I have now cut them both off, and actually wish I'd done it ages ago. They are both mums from the school that my DC attend but I have just started saying a polite hello and having nothing more to do with them.

I feel like I have done the right thing but then I often see posts on here saying it's childish to just cut people off but I feel it was the only thing to do to keep my pride, if that makes sense.

oh yes, without guilt or a second thought. And I don't do confrontation either I just back away and don't engage. Life's too short to bother with people who can't be decent.

However I don't hold grudges and time does often change things, so while I might cut someone out I don't wish them ill, and if I encounter those people again years down the line I don't blank or ignore - I just don't get close again iyswim.

I do but i still feel sad about it for a long time afterwards. I wish things could have been different. Even though cutting them off makes me feel strong, the fact that the friendship went wrong breaks my heart a bit. I'm the sentimental type

Yes I do. Life is too short and too precious and good friends are too hard to find without putting up with shit .
I cut off my friends. Oh it took years mind but I did eventually wske up and smell the coffee. They'd go out for nights out but conveniently could never get hold of me, yet its really strange they could get hold of me when they wanted something. Fucking despise clique exclusive cunts.

. Im not really the argumentative type but I do hold a grudge. My sister however love her as I do is a bitch, she'll scream shout, insults are traded, of course they are. well I guess you don't pass flowers in an argument, do you. But she doesn't hold a grudge,

I'm a mum of two and I work full time, I don't have time to deal with people who make me feel shit, so yes. Prior to having the DC id have been more accommodating, but I realise now that I shouldn't have.

I do this. I don't have time for rubbish. My life is manic and it's easy to cut people out. Also once I've done it, I don't give them another thought and tend to ignore any contact they make with me. I've also done this with my very new ex partner who kept contacting me after I ended it and he gave me a load of abuse. I just don't respond. It washes over me. I'm either too busy to care or a broken person- not sure which.

Yes, absolutely. I think some people see it as the equivalent of a childish footstamp and a tantrum or attention seeking. But those are clearly people who have no experience of truly terrible relationships with others.

I'm completely with Barnaby. I know I'm a bit broken, but I can quite easily cut people out.

Life is too short. What benefit is there to keeping spiteful or unkind people around you?

I cut my EA mother and brother out. After them, other people don't even get a second thought!

Yes, I do now. But I try to be very sure there isn't an innocent explanation first, sometimes things really are down to miscommunications.

After a certain point enough becomes enough.

It does make me sad though. But nothing in this life is worth being treated shabbily or badly. Took me 38 years to reach that conclusion, but I'm not shifting now.

Good for you, why would you talk to people like that?

I only spend time with people I like (online and IRL)

I have and will if needed in the future.

I don't just cut people out for tiny things, I only do it if I don't see another way to sort it. That's is normally because the other person could not or would not take any responsibility for their part (in whatever the specific circumstances were)

It has taken me many years to learn the lesson "I am worth more than that" because of that Iv had a few (not loads) people who it was the necessary (and in hindsight the only) course of action, but to understand that I should cut them out I had to learn that lesson first.

The most hurtful one is still the most painful as we had been friends for over 10 years! I loved her like a sister and still miss her but in spite of that my life is better without the behaviours in it

Definitely. Life is too short. None of us can please all of the people all of the time. We all come across those we don't gel with. If these people are people we have to tolerate (e.g. colleagues or family members) you learn to manage them by keeping them at a distance. Otherwise get rid!

Hell yes! No hesitation whatsoever. I learnt to find my healthy boundaries the hard way.
Learn to listen to your gut instinct, it's there to protect you. Also, it may sound cliche but learning to be your own source of love, approval, support etc stops you attracting and being attracted to the pieces of shits that try to mess with you.

Xxx Be strong xxxx