I recently found out my DH has been messaging another woman, flirty stuff but nothing overtly sexual, still totally inappropriate for a married man. I confronted him and he said straight away that nothing more than flirting had happened and as far as he was concerned nothing more would ever have happened.
I do believe this, but I am so hurt he could do even that, never mind anything else, and the trust I had in him for over 20 years has been badly damaged. One of the main problems with this is he works away a lot, so trust is vital really. I love him so much and really want to try and rebuild our marriage, for us and DS, who is only five and would be devastated if we split.
There are lots of other issues with our relationship, which in honesty probably contributed to him straying in the first place. We've been bumbling along for a long time now. So I know it's not an easy fix, trust aside, but we talked properly for the first time in a long time the other night and I know what we need need to do to address the other issues and I am prepared to do what's needed for that.
Can anyone offer any advice on how we can start rebuilding the trust? The other night he went to show me something on his iPad and I realised he was shutting down web pages before passing it to me. I was immediately suspicious and confronted him. He said he was looking at stuff about relationships, which I believe, but my initial reaction worries me - I can't live my life like that. He doesn't think I'll ever be able to get over it and I'm not sure, but I do know people get over a lot worse and go on to have long happy relationships.
So can we fix this? It seems like such an uphill struggle right now. I feel sick, can't eat or sleep - will I always feel like this or will it get better?
I'm sorry this is so long. I have name changed but promise I am a regular reader, occasional poster who some might recognise.