Why is he still torturing me?

[Gemisagem12]

Okay, cut a long story short. Me and my boyfriend of 5 years broke up, we have a baby and I'm pregnant, about a week after we broke up I found out he was with a girl who he worked with and spent every night there. During the break up things got extremely childish, I would tell him I hated him, then missed him, he would tell me he hated me and would never get back with me, all the good stuff, our child sleeps there on alternate weekends, and I got her back today,
Out of the blue, considering we have been broke up for 3 months now, he texts me and asks how our child is. I said she's fine. About an hour later he texts me
"I'm thinking twice about this relationship with my gf"
I didn't answer, he knows I've read it but I just don't want to get into his personal life anymore, I'm just staying civil for our children.
So why did he tell me that? To get st me? Does he still thinks I'm his friend and I'm there for advice?
He said some horrible things, like he hopes I die in childbirth like my dad (my dad died from cancer, it was painful)
That I'm ugly and fat
A bad mother
All the childish play ground stuff. What is going through his mind.
I've seen his new girlfriend and she is stunning, pure beauty. So why is he texting me? I've made it clear I don't want to know anymore

I would imagine it is to keep you on the hook so when/if it doesn't work you are waiting

Roll your eyes; think "twat"; delete the message; think no more of it.

Who cares what is going through his mind.

You're out of it now. Just ignore him.

Tell him you'll give him 20p the next time you see him and he can call someone who cares.

Sorry that isn't helpful.

He's playing mind games with you. Wants to keep you stringing along because it feeds his ego. Best thing you can do is to delete it and don't respond.

I don't think telling someone they hoped they die a painful death whilst giving birth to their child, is childish playground stuff. And I think you need to remember that when you think of this vile man.

And to answer your thread title, it doesn't really matter why he is doing it. He's clearly being a dick. Don't be fooled into reading these replies and thinking we just don't know him or understand him and dismiss what we're saying on that basis.

He's shown you he's a horrible person. All you can control is how you respond to him.

You can choose to manage you emotional response to it too. It's not easy, but if you write out a list of the 5 worst things he's said or done and read them and repeat something like "he is a dick, I deserve better than that" as a mantrawheneveryou hear from him/find yourself think about him, that will help.

Time and time again I read posts on here where women talk really passively about their role in a shit situation. I'm not talking about deeply entrenched EA relationships, but where you are in the very early stages or out of it completely, you can block it.

He's realised the grass wasn't greener elsewhere and is feeling you out.

The things he said were beyond cruel and unforgivable. Just ignore him and if he brings it up again just say I don't care and change the subject.

'I'm rethinking my relationship with GF' = ' I think I might get back together with you (until next time) as I like a nice warm bed and food and a roof over my head and women fighting over me...'

You are Plan B - in fact, not even that. A stopgap, a standby, useful for a bit until he finds someone else mug enough to fall for his foulness.

He said he hoped you die in childbirth?

He sounds like a real catch.

"He hopes you die in childbirth" This is not childish, no child would say such a thing. He is repulsive.

His girlfriend is probably moving on and he's sounding you out.

He's viewing you as always there for when his idea of what he deserves wont dance to his tune. He's entirely nasty and self serving. You're best off keeping him at a distance for good.

He's a fuckwit, trying to understand the motives of a fuckwit is time you'll never get back.

Ignore him, the nasty vindictive him will soon reappear and replace the manipulative him soon enough.

He's a drama queen. There's a lot of it about these days and sad blokes like him have nothing else in their sad little lives than to make yours as difficult as they can. Gives them a sense of power and control you know.

Also, does he have mental health issues? or issues with women perhaps? I'd steer well clear if I were you. He isn't fit to lick your boots and his childish mind games must be irritating.

What's probably really happening is she's fed up of him already, she's let him know, so he's lining up his return home when she kicks him out but is making it look like he's doing it for you so that you take him back so he isn't out on his arse!

He doesn't want you, but he wants you to want him, to boost his ego.

Just text back ' that's none of my business. You should discuss this with your gf'

I'd just text back 'And?'

You stopped caring.

That's why.

It's not about you, it's about his ego.

Ignore him.

I agree with previous posters it's so you will be there for him, my xh does this with me. Ignore him.

Ignore ignore ignore
He wants you to want him. He wants to feel powerful. He sounds like an arsehole.

You were plan A, until miss 'pure beauty' turned his head and became his plan A. You are now his B plan. It sounds like plan A was all style and no substance and he is considering returning to his original plan A...you.

YOU however have tossed plan A (him) into the bin and your plan B is a bright future without him.

Please don't be any mans B plan.