Right to End Relationship Over Petty Lies?

[Oddsod]

I have a history of relationships with liars. I have no doubt that it had turned me into a paranoid mess. My dad is an alcoholic so my role model from a young age has always been of a liar.

I divorced an habitual liar then my next relationship was with another liar.

Recently I got involved with someone who is kind, loving,thoughtful, romantic, good in bed etc but also has a tendency to tell tall stories. He has also shown himself to be emotional and clingy. He seems to be a bit of a fantasist, at first I laughed it off but then it got to the point where I didn't know what was true and what isn't.

I admit to having controlling tendencies and he said some of his lies were because he was afraid of my reaction. He appears to have anxiety, and has ignored it for years, smoking dope and not taking responsibility.

some of the lies were pointless, exaggerating his family's wealth, telling stories about mistreatment from loved ones then completely changing the story later on, lots of lies about debt, work , dodgy friends etc.

He's setting up a new business which I've been actively promoting and he has done work for my friends, sometimes turning up late, leaving people wondering where he is then blatantly lying to me about it so not only is he lying to me but in my mind he is affecting my reputation as a consequence.

We are both in our forties but being with him is like being with a flakey guy from my youth.

When I have talked this over with friends and family people are divided. Many say I should mind my business and just enjoy the fun times, let him do his thing, others say I don't need the stress, which I don't, constantly worrying about him, I have small kids , health problems, money worries of my own.

So after seven months of frustration, disappointment and tears interspersed with good sex and some laughs I have called time on our 'relationship'. I could feel myself becoming someone I don't like, constant questions, checking up, doubting everything and my brain is so tired and heavy.

What do you think? Are petty lies a deal breaker for you? Is clingy emotional behaviour only allowed in women? Am I applying double standards by not wanting him to cry all the time?

has a tendency to tell tall stories
to be emotional and clingy
bit of a fantasist
I didn't know what was true and what isn't
He appears to have anxiety
smoking dope and not taking responsibility
lots of lies about debt, work, dodgy friends etc
turning up late
blatantly lying to me about it
being with a flakey guy from my youth
frustration, disappointment and tears
my brain is so tired and heavy

This is all copied and pasted from your original OP.
Sooooo many red flags it's frightening.

When did you do the Freedom Programme?
Would it be worth doing it again?

I'm sorry you're going through so much crap.
You are doing so well. KOKO!

and more

I know you are going through a really shit time at the moment. You keep posting as and when. KOKO.

Dear OP,all relationships are a mix of good and bad. It often starts out lovely and then small disappointments creep in and you have to weigh up whether it's Big Stuff or just reality.

You have done a brave thing in recognising pretty early on that there's some Big Bad Stuff and ending the relationship is a brave and adult thing to do.

You will feel sad and lonely for now but that will pass. You are sad because you glimpsed a lovely dream but it really was just that , a dream.

You did the right thing for your sanity and well being.

Hey late returner to the thread. Struggling tonight, was meant to be a weekend away with matey this weekend, instead I was too ill to make a night out that I didn't even want to go to last night then tonight sat on my Todd watching fireworks from my bedroom window after being let down by a friend who'd double booked and chose the more fun option.
So,etimes wonder if life wouldn't be better if I just did what everyone else seems to do and accepted that men always come up wanting. How happy is this making me feel really? Standing on my own two feet is a fucking struggle. I am so alone in this world apart of course from my small children.
Work is heartbreakingly horrible, I haven't forgotten to message you preemptive I've just been a bit overwhelmed, sleeping all the time, struggling with drug side effects. The work thing is a real mare and I feel so alone with it all the pressure.