Your honest opinion!

[changingtimes2015]

First time posting so please bear with me! Basically I need opinions/advice of the state of my marriage.
Been married for 8 yrs and I have 1 child. My H has been quite consistently the same but this past year it has been bothering me. He has in the way I have seen him reasonable as a H, he has always had a drug habit with Cannabis but over the years uses it much more, daily use.
I was away for a few days with friends and we spoke about things and this cropped up. I said the longest I have known him without drugs is perhaps about 2 days?
If he is wearing off the smoke he is very sulky and moody.

He also states I don't seem to spend anytime with him, which to an extent is true but we both have busy lifestyles. His idea to spend time together is groping me and suggesting sex, this no longer works for me, if I don't want to have sex he gets defensive about why I dont. We don't do family holidays ect.

This all used to seem ok but spending time with other women over this past while has opened my eyes as to how our marriage has become like this. I question do I deserve better? I feel perhaps my self esteem is at an all time low and I have just accepted this.

he reminds me he would do anything for me

Except stop smoking drugs, apparently.

Do you like each other? It doesn't sound like you have anything in common, which is probably unsurprising given that he's either muntered and gropey or straight and mardy-arsed.

Well yes, he wont stop smoking, he is in complete denial. I told him last night hat 1 of his mates has been sacked for failing a drugs test, of course he said it wont be for the hash!!

He never sees the problem with his habit and probably never will!

He could quit if he wanted to. My DH and his mates all smoked it when they were much younger, but when jobs and responsibilities came along, they all quit (well, most of them). In the same way that they cut their long hair and generally stopped being lay about fuck wits. You've grown up. He hasn't. Does he take you out? Do you have any meaningful conversation? Is he ok in the bedroom (why is he groping?). It all sounds very very dull.

We don't go out now, a night out would consist of us having drinks in the house where he can also smoke joints.

We used to go to the cinema, but a 30 minute drive each way and 2 hrs odd in the cinema made him tetchy as no smoking. He will never admit it but there would be big sighs etc, just made me on edge.

We don't share a bed any longer due to his restlessness and snoring. We are still sexually active.

Why on earth did you bring a child into this sorry mess?
Really? Some comments just aren't necessary.
My ex was a big weed smoker, they always say its not addictive but their actions clearly suggest otherwise.
I don't know what to suggest really OP, in my experience I either accepted it or left, and like I say he's my ex now. But he was also an asshole in other ways. (And we had more than 1 DC in our 'sorry mess' )

He never sees the problem with his habit and probably never will!

:(