Previous ex drama is here-www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/2451444-Threats-of-violence-and-birthday-contact
After months of violent threats, ex threatened to kill me and snap my neck in the front of the kids so I stopped contact until he went to court for access. He has PR and is on the birth certificate.
Quick update-
He's had no contact with DS since. He sent me a letter to attend mediation which I declined because he's a violent argumentative bully and I'm not paying £300 for the privilege of being screamed at because he can't get his own way. Especially when he's claiming legal aid because he works cash in hand so he gets it for free.
So I hadn't heard anything until I got a phone call from the school on Friday saying ex had turned up and was trying to take DS. I was round the corner so I got there pretty quickly and he was in reception kicking off. They have security and hadn't let him in the door but he was saying he was "fucking taking him and nobody was fucking stopping him"
Headteacher took us into his office and I said that he wasn't taking him because of the threats and to take me to court and then he could see him in a contact centre. He was still screaming and swearing and saying nobody could stop him. I said he had repeatedly threatened to kill me and he said no he hadn't, he'd actually threatened to kill my DP (that's ok then...) and it was my fault oldest DS was scared of him because I shouldn't have had the phone on loud speaker when he rang threatening me (..?)
He was still shouting he was taking him so I calmly said "Well, if I can't stop you taking him, that means you can't stop me" I walked calmly out of the office, down the corridor, got DS and walked out of school holding his hand while ex shouted at me. My DM lives round the corner so we went to hers and locked the door and rang the police while DM went to get oldest DS.
Poor oldest DS had seen ex turn up while he was in assembly and had ran round to his brothers classroom and obviously hadn't been able to find him, and DM found him inconsolable in reception thinking ex had taken him.
Police were surprisingly helpful and are going (not heard if they already have) question him regarding threats. I'm seeing my solicitor later to see where we go from here. ex has been into school this morning and has put in writing that nobody but him or me is allowed to collect him (so I can't have a bloody childminder for work!) and he wants ringing when I collect him or if he's not in school. Just to make my life difficult. He also said I attacked him and wanted headteacher to be a witness! (he's insane, I was nowhere near him! and now I'm scared he's going to try to get me done for an assault that never happened) Both boys are off school until I've got legal advice, they both don't want to go back and oldest is really shaken up.
what a mess :(