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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Signs he is cheating

2 replies

Issabella · 25/09/2015 13:55

I found out two weeks ago my husband of 22 years had been having an affair for 2 months. We both want to stay married and are working hard on our relationship.

However I thought it would be helpful for those out there who aren't sure to share the signs that I picked up on which led me to discover what was happening.

We went on holiday for 2 weeks in August and he was really horrible to me and normally he is the kindest of men. Nothing I did was right.

He was constantly wedded to his phone he even took it to the toilet and when I was next to him he tilted it away from me.

He smiled in a way that he used to smile at me when he got a text.

Prompted by this I decided to check his messages and he had changed his passcode.

He told me he was going to shave his head (I didn't like this look) and he didn't care what I thought.

He called me paranoid and got really defensive if I asked him if anything was wrong.

He went away overnight on a course from work to a location he normally goes to in a day.

When he got back I checked his bag and found a champagne cork.

I then checked his satnav - he told me he had stayed at a premier inn but the last entry on the satnav was for a luxury hotel

At this point I asked him how his hotel had been and I meant the real one not the premier inn. He denied being there and I lied and said someone had seen him there and at this point he confessed.

All the time my gut was nagging me he was up to something so ladies my advice is if you feel something is wrong 90% chance you are right ignore your instincts at your peril.

OP posts:
EnthusiasmDisturbed · 25/09/2015 14:33

over detailing a story

i knew when my ex told me every detail of his afternoon and his training

i had suspected something for a while but it was then i looked in his bag his training clothes were all folded up nice and clean and it all made sense

abneysporridge · 25/09/2015 22:01

all of these that you have listed are so reminiscent of my errant dh. The very first sign was the same for me too - he was needlessly and uncharacteristicly horrible to me at a friends party and everything changed from that day forward.
I do hope everything works out for you and you can rebuild your marriage x

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