I have been married 7 years now, together for 15 years in total. We have a 2 year old son and really since his birth things have not been the same between me and my husband. Having our son was a much bigger change for us and much harder than anything we had ever imagined. The nature of our relationship changed fundamentally in the weeks and months after we became parents and it is hard to imagine getting back what we had. Before we were partners in crime, we both loved a good time, we always had a good social life, liked a drink and a party and most of that is gone now and I am surprised and embarressed to admit how much our relationship was built on a foundation of going out and getting pissed. Also we used to have very active independent social lives and since that has also disappeared and we are at home together alone after our son is in bed it is clearer all the time how little we have in common.
My confidence is also down, I never lost my baby weight and I feel I have aged dramatically since becoming a mother our sex life is sparse and I am never much in the mood anyway.
Another complication is his best girlfriend, she has been about for nearly as long as me they met when a friend of his briefly dated her, it didn't work out but her and my husband became close friends. I felt a bit worried about her when he first started hanging out with her but I grew to like her a lot myself and I know it is shallow but she was always heavy so I felt she was safe, until now. As I gained weight she lost her extra pounds and looks beautiful now and I get jealous when see my husband with her they just look so good together. Also I can see how much in tune they are with each other, how much on the same wave length they are and I can see he is happier in her company than he is with me. I probably wouldn't feel so bad if she was still fat but I know he must find her attractive.
I don't think he would ever do anything or leave me at all and I think he does love me but it isn't the same anymore.