My husband recently told me he was having an emotional affair with a colleague. They apparently both realised they have feelings for each other when he was helping her move house at the weekend, although close friendship and presumably some feelings on both sides have been going on longer. He described it as them being 'in love'.
At first it looked seemed like he wasn't willing to give her up, it would hurt them both too much, and from what he said he wanted us both. I told him there was no way I could accept that and I would have to leave him. He then said he was going to stay with a (male) friend to work out what he wanted but ended up back within an hour as he said leaving me felt wrong.
We've talked a lot, we both want to work things out and although he hasn't used it as an excuse we'd lost a lot of closeness in our relationship over the past months, we weren't being affectionate and communicating mainly about kids/practical stuff. We are trying to fix that as we both love each other.
He's been totally honest with me, we're talking lots, he has answered all my questions. We're working on our relationship and I believe that we can work things out but I'm having trouble getting past some things - he made me feel like I mattered no more to him than her and at first seemed like he wouldn't stop seeing her even if it meant I left. He still seems to think that they can have a more platonic friendship somewhere down the line. I can't see me ever being OK with that, its bad enough that they will still see each other at work every day. He has deleted her number and promised he will only speak to her if he has to about work and won't be spending time alone with her.
We only moved here 4 months ago, all my friends and family are 100 miles away and I'm 7 month pregnant. There would never be a good time but this is terrible timing to have to deal with this.
How am I going to get over this and feel OK with him again? I want to, we've always had a good relationship up until now and I love him.