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Relationships

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Divorcing

1 reply

Bristolgirl2015 · 05/09/2015 20:24

I thought I was doing quite well. My husband walked out on me and our son 5 months ago. He has since moved in with another woman rumoured to be his girlfriend although the coward won’t admit it. He is a miserable, chronically dissatisfied, critical man who really only ever thinks about himself. Nothing I did could ever make him happy. I have sold our house, bought a new house which we will move into in a couple of weeks, filed for divorce and have tried to get on with life.

In the last couple of weeks I have started packing up the house, going through old photos, gifts and mementos. All the usual stuff that goes with a marriage. I felt like I was moving on but he is everywhere. I just feel grief stricken all over again. Can’t sleep, having nightmares when I do and I wake up sweating and panicking. I try and keep myself busy and put a brave face on but whenever I’m alone I am crying all the time. Because we have a child together I keep having to see and speak to him. Can’t even block him. I would never take him back but can't seem to stop wondering where it all went wrong. I don’t really know anyone who has been divorced that I can talk to who understands what I am going through. When does it all get better?

OP posts:
goddessofsmallthings · 05/09/2015 21:04

It will start getting better as soon as you've moved into your new home where the only physical reminders of the past will be those you want to display for all to see.

At the moment you're packing up the end of era and uncovering all sorts that remind you of happier times has caused you to revisit your marriage and feel grief for what could have been if only he wasn't "a miserable, chronically dissatisfied, critical man who really only ever thinks about himself".

There's also sadness for yourself, the you that was so filled with hopes and dreams for the future - and who was so stupid for thinking you could ever make a silk purse out of a sow's ear Smile but don't beat yourself up for this, honey, as many others have tried in vain to achieve that particular miracle.

Best to put it down to 'it went wrong because it could never go right' and look forward to the unfolding of a future that will be considerably happier than recent times.

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