Good Afternoon.
This is a long post but I am desperate to hear some other stories and get some advice.
I'm an anxious mess and fearing the worst. In a weeks time I will appear at court for the second time. My ex partner is taking me to court for contact. He has not seen my daughter since she was 4 months old, she is now 2 1/2. Has never had any interest in her, wanted me to abort her and has anger issues. He is aggressive, out of control and has series mental health issues, so much so he has been sectioned in the past. Before I even fell pregnant there was several incidents. One of which we were at an 18th he got too drunk and was thrown out. He barged into my house without me even being there, and despite being told several times off my family to leave he didn't. Cut a long story short he threw a mug out of the window and damaged a neighbours car. Another incident was when he attacked my 13 year old brother, and also assaulted me when I told him to get out.
I fell pregnant at 17, he was angry, tried to get me to abort, said he didn't want to be a dad. I was dead against I don't believe in abortion and neither do my family. His Mum was told that was fine we would be fine without him, but he came crawling back. Didn't support me my whole pregnancy, even through the agony of gallstones. I paid for EVERYTHING on 80 quid a fortnight whilst he was getting over 200. After my daughter was born I was still forking out for everything. He was not supportive, he would swear and shout at my newborn is she was sick on him, I did all the nappy changes all the feeding, bathing. He didn't do much with her but instead played on game consoles and complain about her getting up once or twice during the night.
The big break up was when she was 3 weeks old. I was all ready to go out a walk with a friend and him. He thought it would be absolutely hilarious to fart in her pram then zip the raincover up. For once I spoke up for myself and said it was immature and not funny. He kicked off big time and tried to take my child away but I got her out the pram. He repeatedly shouted at me as I cradled my crying baby. Going on about how his family never get to see her and how I never leave the house. (I had an emergency c-section, and took longer to recover due to blood pressure problems, and his family were up all the time.) My Mum never usually got involved but this time she asked him to calm down and have some time out. He continued to shout in her face and then stormed upstairs. He then came down and through my girls pram into the kitchen narrowly missing my friend. After being asked several times to leave our home he lashed out, pushed my Mum into the wall and punched her. I called the police and had to appear in court, but it was abolished and dismissed.
Another occasion was when I was in town with my daughter at 4 months old, and a guy I was seeing. He stormed up to me and tried to grab her shouting and swearing. I called the police straight away and again it went to court only to be abolished and dismissed. My daughter has been sleeping all night in her own bed from 3 weeks and since then has not.
For a while after the break up I had been meeting with him once a week in the town centre, putting myself and daughter at risk because I believed it was the right thing to do. This however did not last long. His Mother did continue to come up nearly every week even though I wasn't comfortable with it but this also had to stop as I was getting non stop abuse from the entire family any time I went out.
There is a lot more to add but I am trying not to make this post too long. He is taking me through the courts for contact and it is my worst fear. He has no interest in her at all and is doing this all because the his mother wants it. He has told lies about me and the situation. My lawyer said it is unlikely to happen but a report was done where a solicitor that is not on any side visits each of us. He said it's very unlikely a father doesn't get contact. I just don't think it's fair and in the best interest of my child. He will get bored like he did with all the other chances he was given to see her. She's a smart. happy and smiley child and I don't want her to go to a contact centre for him to get bored of her again. He has never paid any more than a couple of instalments of 50 quid for her either. He is also thought to be taking drugs, which wouldn't surprise me as he took ecstasy on a night out when I was pregnant. He gets uncontrollably drunk and has landed in hospital with alcoholic poisoning. I don't want that sort around my child.
Has anyone else out there been through similar or can give me some tips for court?