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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Please please help me I think I'm having a nervous breakdown

16 replies

Hithere820 · 28/08/2015 20:50

Regarding my last post (prostitues and lies) husband looking at escorts online and lying etc I feel like I've cracked. I've got a sickness bug and today I've had our baby and my DC who is 6 he's just come back from a 4 week holiday. I put them both to bed at 7 he's still awake coming in every 5 mins I'm being sick every 10 minutes and I'm in desperate need for sleep for work tomorrow. My husband wants us to try again thinks I'm not putting enough into our relationship. he's at work from 8am-12pm everyday. I need him to leave I need him to leave me alone and get out of my life. I'm completely depressed and have sat crying all day.

OP posts:
Twinklestein · 28/08/2015 21:09

Can you get an emergency appointment with the GP and get you signed off sick from work for the week?

Twinklestein · 28/08/2015 21:10

Tomorrow morning I meant.

Original poster
Hithere820 · 28/08/2015 21:16

I can't im the only person who can lock up, Ive had 3 panic attacks to the point I couldn't get my breath. Not blaming the kids here btw it's just all got too much for me. How can everything in life be my fault when I act haven't done anything I'm struggling.

OP posts:
Twinklestein · 28/08/2015 21:23

None of this is your fault, your husband is blaming you for problems that have been caused by him.

What work do you do and who else works with you?

Original poster
Hithere820 · 28/08/2015 21:27

I work in retail at the minute 2 managers are on holiday so that leaves just me, I've just been promoted so can't risk losing it for one shitty night. I feel like a right mess don't jn what's wrong with me .

OP posts:
LIZS · 28/08/2015 21:31

You can't go in if you are throwing up. Can you ask him to leave once you feel better and give yourself she breathing space. You haven't asked to be put in this situation , he has taken advantage of you being preoccupied and prioritising your family.

Original poster
Hithere820 · 28/08/2015 21:35

Hopefully I'll be ok in the morning. I was just in a bit shock before I feel as though I've calmed down I just couldn't breathe or stop crying. I cannot take the lies anymore!

OP posts:
pocketsaviour · 28/08/2015 21:37

OK. Unfortunately illness does happen and while you don't want to get a sickness record, it may be unavoidable. Could you go in tomorrow morning, let the staff in, then go home for the day, and return to lock up? If you could get an appt with the out of hours GP (or go to the walk in centre) you would have some mitigation when your line manager returns, in case they question it.

Do you often throw up when you're stressed? If so, once you've got your DS settled (I expect he is excited to be home?) try to do some calming thoughts and slow breathing - that should also help the nausea. I find these meditations really good for calming racing thoughts Mindfulness finding peace I play them on my phone.

Can you get fuckwit H to go and get you some peppermint tea to try to calm your stomach? Since he's hanging about he might as well make himself useful.

Hang in there OP. Keep breathing. Flowers I have got to go offline now but there will be others along if it helps to chat.

pocketsaviour · 28/08/2015 21:38

X-post. Glad you have been able to calm down a bit. This is such a stressful time for you, be very kind to yourself right now.

Original poster
Hithere820 · 28/08/2015 21:40

I'm gonna pop to walk in tomorrow as I've been feeling off for a while now, he's at work. Thank you for the advice I'm just exhausted and fed up!

OP posts:
swisscheesetony · 28/08/2015 21:46

Go to the doc. They gave me diazepam (Valium) - just takes the edge off it al. X

winkywinkola · 28/08/2015 22:00

My word, you're amazing.

You're still coping with all this on your plate. I'm very impressed.

You might feel like you're not but you really are. Your dcs are lucky to have you on their side.

You sound like the only rational adult they have in their lives at the moment!

It sounds so very tough and I really hope you do go and get whatever help your G.P. thinks is right for you.

It's not failing to get help.

Flowerpower41 · 29/08/2015 06:16

You could also try calling the Samaritans op - they are an invaluable service in an emergency if you wish to offload to an anonymous stranger. They dont' give advice but are just a supportive listening service.

Good luck.

amarmai · 29/08/2015 18:27

You are definitely under major stress and sick . If there are others workers, can you go into work just for the lockups and rest in a back room? When the panic attacks start can you soothe and distract with music/ yoga/meditation/sleep with the children?

Original poster
Hithere820 · 29/08/2015 20:54

Thank you for the replies! MyH says he doesn't understand why I'm so worked up. If only I could speak to him but when I look at him the words don't come out. I feel very very alone and under a lot of pressures, home and work.

OP posts:
KetchupIsNearlyAVegetable · 30/08/2015 07:56

Your H wants you to forget about his bad behaviour. He is pretending you are odd to be so upset by his behaviour because he want to think he isn't bad. You are right. He is wrong.

I don't know how you manage to not scream "Because you are a lying, cheaty, sleazy arsewipe!" At the end of every whinge by him.

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