Feeling sick with stress- 6 months pregnant- in law related :(

[Wishful80smontage]

Really long story but my mil argued with me and oh in front of our dd while I'm 6 month pregnant- refusing to come to our wedding unless we invited his nc sister. She said some really hurtful things and hasn't rang him up since I feel so ill with all this stress. I'm so upset today we've basically said after speaking to my parents that its best we get married on our own as his family wouldn't come.
In all this the reason we fell out with his sis was because she was acting aggressive and ignoring our baby- which the family acknowledges. Basically they know we're not the bad guys but we are being treated as if we are. I can't think straight I just know she came round ranted at me for an hour then left- I'm really disgusted at her.

Bump

What does your DH say?

Tbh you don't need the stress so go nc until after the baby is born and you are settled.
Getting married is something you do for you the couple so if doing it alone makes it stress free do it.

He's not happy but at the same time he did minimise it all when he spoke to her last night reassuring her it wasn't all her fault my parents could t come to make sure she wasn't upset never mind I've been in tears most of night and today :( he said he will say to her next time they speak that she shouldn't speak to me like that when I'm pregnant.

Is there some valid reason your sil acted this way? Has she had a mc or possibly another problem you aren't aware of hence her mum cutting her some slack? If you want a family wedding I would try to get your dh to speak with his DM and get to the bottom of it.

Family fall outs are crap and best sorted out rather than fester for years. It must have been a bad incident for you to go no but from what you have written she ignored your baby so you went no sounds a bit lame.

She broke up from her partner so think mil cuts her slack due to that.
When our dd was born she basically didn't see her for months and then went mad at oh for not being there for his dn's since the birth of his own child. Arguements followedsge got aggresive- we didn't want that in front of dd went nc.

I need to get over this my stomach is in knots and I feel sick with all the stress I just can't get last night out of my mind :(

You should think about moving this thread to Relationships - you'll get lots of constructive advice on there.

Thanks how do I do that- do I report it?

So basically sil is mummy's little princess and she matters more than the rest of the family. Keeping her happy is No1 priority. Fuck that.

We didn't invite people we didn't like to our wedding, four of dh's relatives and my entire family got missed off.

Nobody died because they didn't get to come to my wedding. Afaik anyway.

Exactly fluff sil knows not of this so as not to upset her. They've not told her anything

What did the SIL do that was so bad? It must have been pretty awful for her to not be invited to her brothers wedding.

Are you trying to say that she's ignoring the baby that hasn't been born yet or do you have an older child?

We have a nearly 3 year old which she basically acted although she didn't exist for the first 18 months of dd's life- never visiting, ignoring her when she was there not inviting her or us to family parties etc. oh hasn't brought it up although was upset it only came to a head when sil told him he was a shit brother for not being there enough for her and her children since he had his own child. When he went over to talk she was very aggressive and has since been nasty to him and me on social media he asked if she could be civil in front of our child at family functions she said no- so we went went nc from then on.