Don't really know why I'm posting this. Need some perspective on it really.
Here's the background. I know (from other half telling me) that before we got together, this woman, who he says has been nothing more than a friend, expressed feelings for him and wanted more than friendship. He says he said no and despite this, she brought it up several times.
I've become aware that before I came on the scene, he was going out for meals with her and her kid and doing odd jobs for her round at her house. She had recently split with her long term partner (who was my bloke's mate). I've never met either of them. He says he was just being a friend, however she might well have been taking a different view on events.
Anyway, long story short...even though she knows him and I are together, she has continued trying to arrange 1 to 1 meetings with him and sending him texts and liking all his posts on social media that don't involve me, putting kisses, writing things that position her as a significant other in his life and if he doesn't answer a text, sending a follow up saying why haven't you answered me etc.
He told me a week ago that "he had to go and meet her soon" or she would think he's just dropped her out because he's in a relationship. Somehow that feels like her feelings are a bigger priority than mine. I have no issue with him having female friends, but friends don't express feelings for each other or push boundaries and going to meet someone 1 on 1 that has previously put the moves on, whilst now in a relationship, doesn't seem appropriate to me. I wouldn't do it were it the other way round.
I'm not sure what to make of this. I trust him, but I don't think I trust her. It feels like she is trying to test the boundaries to see what he will do. I only have his word to go on, that whatever happened pre-him and I is accurate. His way of dealing with it so far is to more or less ignore her or laugh it off despite me being honest and saying it was bothering me. She comes across as one of those thick skinned types that takes that as a green light to proceed, i.e. not hearing NO means YES.
Not sure what to think or what to do, just that I know it's now beginning to take up headspace in my life and it feels like there's a third person in my relationship.