How do you cope / readjust?

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When someone hellbent on revenge anhiliates you financially in divorce? I'm talking about a colossal fall in living standards here. I don't want to talk about how a settlement is reached but how you get through the pain of vastly changed circumstances.

God you poor thing. Do you have a good lawyer?

It's something many of us have had to do.
It's the casualty of a failed marriage.
I was left as a single parent with no financial help at all from her dad after about 8 months.
It's a huge wake up call.
It's all about tightening your belt. Cutting down on any bills you possibly can. Shopping better and being frugal.
I am in the process of downsizing as we speak.
You will cope. We all have to take hit with living standards when this happens (well a lot of us anyway).
But as PP says, get a SHL and get them to do what they can for you.
It needs to be fair though, no matter who's fault or what has happened.
I was more than fair with my Ex, even after everything. I just wanted to be free of him.
I'm sorry you are going through this but you will get through it.

Hi OP, I have been through this also. Downsized from a 4 bed roomed detached house to a very small 3 bed roomed semi in a not so nice area. My DC were 10 & 8 at the time. I increased my hours in work and DC had to go to after school clubs. I cut down my shopping bills. It wasn't easy but I got through it. My Ex H got financial help from his parents to buy a really lovely property which kind of highlighted my situation. Fifteen years on I came out of it a stronger person. I feel for you but like Hellsbells I just wanted to get out of a toxic marriage.

I'm one of those people who likes to know information and facts. I'm finding it helpful to read books about separation and coping. I've borrowed a couple of Relate books and just started the first one last night. There are some really irritating comments (or perhaps parts I'm just not ready to accept yet?) but there are also some thoughts that I'm finding reassuring.

I'm also journalling my thoughts and trying to be Mindful about them.

I'm talking to a lot of people and leaning on them and accepting their help (very difficult because I'm usually very independent and quite private).

It's very hard and you have to plan.