How do you deal with your friends remaining friends with your exes?

[BoredAdminGirl]

My friend has tagged me in something on Facebook and I know my ex has been commenting. She is blocked but I can tell by the replies that it's her that my friends are speaking to. Things like "I miss you too insert name here"

It's really pissing me off. They don't understand how emotionally abusive she was to me and swear the sun shines out of her ugly gaslighting ass.

I am biting my tongue and trying not to rise to it.

Anyone else experiencing the same?

I know my ex just loves commenting on things and speaking to my friends to rile me up. She even messages my dad! We broke up about 5 years ago

I thought you were going to say that it was a recent breakup, but 5 years ago?? Honestly, I think you should just let it go. You can't dictate who your friends can and can't be friends with unfortunately.

Messaging your dad is a bit off - but it depends how long you were together?

Time to let go in afraid.

Honestly, I think it's a mistake to think that other people's friendships with an ex are an adjudication of your relationship with that person. Most people just like to hang out with others who seem fun. That person might be a whole lot less fun behind closed doors, but that's not what the friendship is about. (How many of your friends would you date, in all honesty?)

I know how much this hurts. My entire family 'sided' with my abusive ex and chose to see him over the period that we broke up. They don't speak to him now because he was mildly rude to my sister, whose feelings clearly matter far more than mine do!! The whole thing taught me that you have to just live your own life, irrespective of the relationships other people have with those around you. You can't demand that friends don't speak to your ex just because you'd like that to happen (well, you can, but if you do you might find yourself a bit lonely).

I haven't told them not to speak to her, its because she was so manipulative and cruel when we broke up, we stayed friends for many years until I met someone else. She was texting her calling her fat and telling her lies about me. I guess my friends don't care about that

Untag yourself.