just broke off year and half long distance relationship . Feel it right thing to do under circumstances but overwhelmed with sadness it ended up this way . Feel scared. I did it by text as have tried to speak with him for 3 days but every time I ring he says " hi .. You are on loud speaker my brother/ friend is here "
Background is stood by him as he was separated ( living apart ) from his ex wife when we met and sorting out divorce . I agreed to remain in background for a while til he has settled shared care agreement of dc,s
It dragged on and on and I got jealous of ex as he kept on cancelling plans with my ds and I so she didn't find out about me and "get spiteful "and I ended up feeling like the other woman. I would never get involved with a married man .
It was a hard horrible time and I faced a lot of bitchiness from mums at school as he had ( by weird twist of fate ) worked with one of my ds school dads and story got turned into Chinese whisper .
Now he has his divorce ( 2 weeks ) . The point at which we were going to be together and ds and I move to be with him ... Yet he has done a total u turn and has spent 2 weeks saying he questions our future as I got so upset about the ex wife and that he doesn't know if he wants to get committed again and is " confused"
He says he loves me , there is nobody else blah blah but doesn't see why we " can't be together without commitment or expectation "
This is the guy who begged me not to leave him through his divorce , who my ds thinks world of. Who told me he loved me .
Just came back from week away with him and his dc ( adorable ) and my ds and he met my parents who finally accepted him and were lovely to his dc. We went in separate beds because of his dc which upset my ds as he is used to the opposite and I think bought back the end of my marriage to his dad.
It worked well during day but in evenings he just got drunk and treated me like a holiday buddy
I felt his ex should be told about me before we went away with kids. Of course they told her ( ages 7 and 5 ) as I allow nail polish on girls etc and he told me triumphantly how good it felt to tell her " none of your business .. If she lives with me you get to meet her " I was heartbroken to be suddenly in the non serious camp .
He says he feels let down too As he gave his ex a huge pay off to try and speed up proceedings in order to be with me but my getting angry with him over cancelled plans ( a year and a half of cancelled plans ) and his making me hide when I went to visit his home as she lives near has led to his " cold feet "
It's been a horrible roller coaster at times
I do love him so so much but am not prepared to be casual or step back having waited so long.
We looked at properties together
Schools for ds
Read books on how to help his kids with divorce .
He met my ex
He hasn't even read my text he is so busy celebrating his divorce .
He says he feels emotionally unsupported by me because he can't " share his commitment fears " with me
Does he realise I have feelings too ?
I am heartbroken