I think my admirer is close to over stepping the mark and it scares me

[WoodyNLol]

I remember reading a similar story on here about a martial arts teacher who took a fancy to a mumsnetter and I remember thinking it was similar to what I was experiencing but mine didn't seem as bad. Anyway that is rapidly changing and today I actually felt a bit scared of him?
Basically my story is that I trained in karate from the age of 16. Had an injury, didn't go back for years and then last year joined a new club. Within weeks the instructor had made it obvious that he "fancied me" ... I won't say "had feelings for me" because I dont think IT was on that level. I think he basically just fancied me a bit. He made a few innapropriate suggestions and I told him he was being innapropriate and it seemed to settle down. Now, I've been away from the club for a bit and only returned last week. First session was fine. Second session got a bit weird as the kids in the junior class all left at 7.30 and all the seniors seem to be on holiday. Therefore it ended up being just me and him. It's a public sports centre so I went with it, doors open, people walking past etc and on the whole it was fine but I noticed a few low level comments creeping in again. Such as "it's nice, being alone isn't it, we don't often get this opportunity".
Anyway, I forgot about it. This morning I turn up to training (different venue, a private community hall which is shut off to public on a Sunday and he holds the keys) and it was just me and him again until the others arrived (typically everyone else was late today). It got really uncomfortable, he kept coming really close to me, saying stuff like he thinks about me a lot. I noticed him going to the door and I shit mysen thinking he was going to lock it and then another bloke turned up.

Yes,definitely leave the group. If not turn up later at the start as everyone else seems to be doing. Then leave the same time as everyone else. That way you won't be alone with him.

I trained in martial arts for years and one owner/ instructor "targeted" me too-but not the seductive comments and engineering alone time. I eventually left because of the emotional manipulations.

Anyway, I really loved martial arts!!! But with that said, the wear and tear on joints as you age is a serious side-effect.

If you can not find a different dojang then perhaps it might be a good time to step away from it altogether. You could switch to something else like yoga. Or cross fit. (Anything!)

Just understand that
every time you attend class, he will see it as a sign of encouragement.

I do not think you will be able to stay and have him become respectable towards you. He has made it clear that he is a predator with an agenda. Your protests have been polite and in the moment. But they have been completely ignored. As said above-respect your fear and trust it. Martial arts training is not worth this very real threat.

His behavior goes against the self-control, character, standards of ethical behavior that martial arts studios promote. It is very disgusting and hypocritical of him to abuse his position in this way.

Don't go back. No discussion, no contact.

You must put your safety first. Don't override it because it's the only group in the area, or he hasn't done anything yet, or any other excuse you're thinking of.

If he was just acting inappropriately that would be one thing, but you were frightened. That's different.

Read the book pocketsaviour linked to if you can.