pregnant and relationship urgent advise needed

[Gorgeousxxx]

Hi

I have found out I am 4weeks pg and even though it was in the pipeline with bf - its happened abit quick. I am keeping baby if alls well, but bf seems to have turned is this shock???, he seems to be pushing me away, and I am staying at my mums as he wants a break but think its bes for us anyway.....
but I feel for someone that this but its happened too soon that he has taken this well bably??? is it normal... he is 34 and I am 27... so we are not babies....

any adcise or similar situations???
xx

I think its a shock for both future Dads (and mums) when it finally happens. Its a huge step in any relationship to start a family. It does change things but it not necessarily for the worst. I am afraid I dont have any expereince in this but all I can say is give him some time and space to get his head around it all and keep smiling. Its a very exciting time for you. Good Luck.

Thanks so much for the comment.
It hard having to take things from his place to go home to mine again when we have lived in one place for a while... and he wants his key...
but again he isnt being irrational.... he loves me so much so he say's....

xx

It is a huge shock when you discover you're pregnant. (You hope it'll happen but somehow convince yourself it'll take ages). I second Kessernags - give your bf space and time to let the news sink in - I think men need more time to adjust to the idea of becoming a dad but once they've sorted it out in their own heads - are secrectly thrilled. All my male friend say being a dad is the best thing thats ever happen to them. Keep you chin up, enjoy the thrill of being a mum (it's the best thing EVER I promise you) {{{{{hugs}}}}}

Thats girls...

I hope he doesnt leave me , but either way I have to be strong....
I had pains yesterday in my stomach so went to a and e and and they done scans and tests etc and said I am def preggers, but not sur eon the pain they havent sqid anything, my tests all came back positive pg.
I am bit worried as this is what I want... cant wait???
bf was very concerned how I was, but today said if I am collecting my stuff to leave the key aswell... so this is whats making me doubt it...???

anyone experienced this, I know I am answering to relationships but its the whole part of it

xx

sorry I meant thanks girls, not thats girls..... ha ha

Don't worry too much to begin with, for me it was the other way round. I did the test and burst into tears sobbing my heart out telling DH I didn't want a baby, I couldn't cope etc I was really really shocked. DH on the other hand was over the moon, it took me a good few days to get to grips with it and I was the one who was pregnant so for a guy to feel like this it will probably take a little longer.

Just give it time and approach the situation in a few weeks if he hasn't come around by then.

Congratulations and Good luck xx

also is it normal at 4weeks not to see anything on a scan, even though all tests are positive, and high hcg??

x

I'm profoundly unconvinced by your boyfriend, to be honest. The "I think it's better if you stay with your parents for a while, sure, could be just initial nerves. But wanting his key back as well? It sounds to me as though he is trying to dump you gently. I hope I'm wrong, though.

Congratulations, by the way! And stomach cramps are very very very very normal in early pregnancy, so try not to worry unless they are very painful (always better to be safe than sorry, though).

Yes, normal at 4 weeks. There's very little there at that point, really.

Put yourself first for the moment. He'll either come round, or he won't, but it doesn't hurt to give him the impression that you'll survive perfectly well without him. Try to keep things amicable with him but don't get needy: a man who feels pushed into sticking around will bring it up endlessly about how he "did the right thing and you're not grateful (ie won't give him sex on demand or lend him money to go to the pub)". Most men, given time, make doting daddies but it can take a while. My DS wasn't planned and his father fled when I announced the pregnancy (I don't and didn't blame him, he was an old drinking buddy and the two of us got a little careless one night, hence DS) but reappeared wanting to make contact about a month before DS was born. He wasn't much use for the first 8 months or so but got much more interested once baby was old enough to say "Daddy". Now Daddy is an excellent, much-loved father and free babysitter on tap, so things may well turn out for the best for you too.
Good luck, anyway.

your right - I dont for one minute think he is trying to announce we are OVER. I honestly think its the shocked and he needs time...