Split, Want to get back together - now New Girlfriend

[lifeunknown]

I split with the father of my 2 x DC 4 months ago. Tried for 2 months softly to sort things out then I found out he was seeing someone else and I stepped up my game, this was following his 2 months of him trying to sort things (and me rejecting). Now I find he has a girlfriend.
He does not know i know. I'm devastated and trying to pull him back to me. I can see the lies, whiles he tries to make things work He was not keen to sort it out & now I know why. I can see his pain as he lives this duplicitous life. I had a time stamp on it that has passed, and I dont know what to do.
I want him, I ruined it mostly - he is my DC's father. He's unsure but seemingly pretending to try whilst shagging her. I should be worth more, but my family unit is at stake - and I care more about that right now.

Anyone in the same boat and can advise?

If you're feeling suicidal please seek help in RL: there is information on MN on this. Don't struggle on alone.

Your priority right now needs to be your mental health.

Don't play the "pick me" dance.

LitreOftea - Yes, there's definitely an element of that for me. She is really irrelevant. He's the one who got away scot free. I've been plodding along trying to maintain some semblance of "normality" for the sake of DC - he trots off for fun. So yes, that's a kick in the teeth too.

Don't try and guess what he is thinking ask him out right , talk to him , get all.this out of your head and into the open .

Hi lifeunknown - we've very sorry you're going through such a difficult time at the moment.

We hope you don't mind, but when these threads are flagged up to us we usually add a link to our Mental Health resources - here. You can also go to the Samaritans' website here, or email them on [email protected]. Support from other Mumsnetters is great and we really hope you will be able to take some comfort from your fellow posters, but as other MNers will tell you, it's really a good idea to seek RL help and support as well.

All the best from MNHQ, and take care of yourself