Very scientific Cocklodger poll.

[SylvanianCaliphate]

Straw poll amongst ourselves to give an anecdotal idea just how widespread this is.

Q1. Have you lived with more than one serious partner?
Q2. Have you felt used/ unfairly burdened (not only financially)by a partner/s? How many of them?
Q3. Did you stay with/ rectify/ things worked out eventually with them?

I will go first

1. Yep, three.
2. Two of the relationships I definitely contributed more.
3. Both ended, one ended badly.

Q1. Have you lived with more than one serious partner?
Yes, been married more than once
Q2. Have you felt used/ unfairly burdened (not only financially)by a partner/s? How many of them?

One, who I didnt live with but seemed to view my home as his home when he felt like it. Didnt put his hand in his pocket for anything other than to check his balls were still there.
Q3. Did you stay with/ rectify/ things worked out eventually with them?
Dumped him and told his mother all the lies he had told her and how he was using her as a cashpoint (seriously,she fell for him "losing" his wallet once a month, a week or so before payday? Every. Fucking. Month.) She called me a liar and a gold digger! His family was rich, I was poor (mainly thanks to him) and when I pointed out that I although I didnt have much, I lived independently and paid all my own bills, which is more than he ever did, she just said it again! I was 20 and he was 25, and twenty years later he still dresses like she buys his clothes, and I happen to know that she does!

1. Yes, two.

1. Yes, both. Both serially unfaithful; both liars & frauds generally, not only with me; both sexually abusive. First was violent and a domestic bully. No real financial abuse from either until the end, though I earned more than both and did pay for more. I lost out badly in both divorces.

1. First marriage went through a lot of 'rectifications' but I quit when he fell in love with an OW. Second one was quite short. He left me, thank god.

Q1.
yes, 2 marriages and one live in

Q2. It's funny the very first live in didn't work but I was very young and independent so didn't feel used by him.

The marriage I'm in now he has worked 2 years out of our 6 year marriage. I do feel used and I am being used.

Q3. I'm leaving him.

1. Yes, three.
2. Yes, the first two. No.2 still owed me £K+++ when we split and has never paid it back, perhaps spending it on his wedding last month, I dunno.
3. No. Once a CL, always a CL. Absolute NC, my decision.

Yes. 3 including current dp

Yes. Two of them.

I ended both relationships.

The first was more young and stupid than abusive. No idea about cost. We were buying a house together. He wanted to carry on as if we were still living at home. He was on a final warning at work for not tur turning in or being late. The week I ended it he lost his job too. I bought him out of the house in the end.

The second is my dds father. A complete cunting cocklodger. Financially, emotionally and physically abusive. I ltb with fuck all apart from my baby (she was about 4 months old). She is 11 now and he still doesn't support her financially.

My current dp is a superstar. Love the bones of him. We can have anything we want. And him working his bollocks off enables me to be a sahm. And I am in charge of the finances.

Yes. Yes. Yes and then ended disastrously.

1. I've lived with one partner
2. Yes - I paid 100% of the mortgage and bills due to his business, which apparently never in the 7 years we lived together made enough to contribute anything. Despite having pretty much zero in the way of overheads as it was run from home.
3. Ended - he had an affair.

Yes
Yes,one
Couldn't get rid ,lasted 4 yrs, violent ending police involved
he lied cheated raped ..nice

Maybe time to name change ....or get a new hobby

Q1. Have you lived with more than one serious partner? Yes
Q2. Have you felt used/ unfairly burdened (not only financially)by a partner/s? How many of them? Yes- twice, my first girlfriend and my most recent girlfriend before my current marriage.
Q3. Did you stay with/ rectify/ things worked out eventually with them? No, we split-amicably in both cases.

Three (2 live in, 1 marriage)
Two, the second by far the worst
Both ended badly. Worst was the second, who I married and stayed with far too long, now mid-divorce

Yes
One
I got rid and felt much relief!

No, No, not applicable.

Nearly 23 years wed and 27 living together as a couple
I'm well blessed

Q1 - 1
Q2 - met on holiday, he moved in quite quickly, we had a baby, again quite quickly (I wanted the baby more than him due to biological clock like Big Ben at 35). He was forthcoming to a certain extent with money. It was split 50/50 but I paid bills etc. out of my half :) so not very fair huh and he ended up have quite a lot of "pocket money"
Q3 - Sod that! kicked him out after a year and never lived with anyone again.

That was enough for me :) My home, my child, my life.

One serious relationship. First 6 years things were very equal.
Last 4 he was absolutely a cock lodger. Told everyone we were getting divorced about 4 years before he mentioned it to me whilst allowing me to financially support him and spend every last penny I had trying to dig us out the shit.

No, no, n/a.

Been with DH for 17 years... And he's improved with age .

1.No
2.No
3.N/A

No
No
N/A

only one. I lived with exBF as we were discussing getting engaged. DH and I never lived together until we got married.

1. no

1. I broke up with exBF, but we stayed friendly

1. Two
2. One, many years ago.
3. I left him - unfaithful, vicious, stupid and arrogant