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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

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Original poster

DH in a foul mood and he's ruined my weekend

22 replies

MinecraftMania · 26/07/2015 23:03

DH does this every two or three months and it's really starting to make me question the relationship.

He went out on Friday night. Got home at midnight, a bit merry but not drunk.

And has been in an awful mood since he got out of bed yesterday morning.

He's moody, snappy, uncommunicative, rolls his eyes if I speak and has said nasty things to me like he always does if he's in a mood. Yesterday I was asking him something, perfectly nicely and politely and he said 'You're a nagger' and kept looking at me really nastily and saying in a nasty voice 'Nagger'.

Today he just disappeared upstairs halfway through the afternoon and had a 2 hour nap.

All childcare has been left to me this weekend. However when I told DD off about something this morning DH came down on me like a ton of bricks, in front of DD.

Every time I have spoken to him this evening he's snapped at me as if I've asked a stupid question or as if I'm something he's scraped off his shoe.

I have had enough.

OP posts:

pictish · 26/07/2015 23:07

No wonder. What next?

woowoo22 · 26/07/2015 23:07

What a dick. What do you want to do?

Ohwhatfuckeryisthis · 26/07/2015 23:07

Hmm, any other suspicious behaviour? It's totally not on, we all have moods, but doesn't excuse being rude and nasty. But it sounds terribly like something else is going on.

mooth · 26/07/2015 23:39

It's not right, and you know it.

Yarp · 27/07/2015 06:38

Hmm

Is it possible he is taking out feelings of guilt on you?

whooshbangprettycolours · 27/07/2015 06:51

Who else would he treat like this? His friends? His family? Or wouldn't he dare be so rude and disrespectful? Would you treat anyone like this?

This is out of control disrespect and tells you all you need to know about him.

I'm sorry OP but he's not worthy of you.

DorothyBastard · 27/07/2015 07:14

Is it possible he's taking something on his nights out? He could be coming down. Any secret drug use would be a total deal breaker for me.

ThumbWitchesAbroad · 27/07/2015 07:19

Does he only do this after he drinks? Or, as pps are suggesting, does he do drugs on his nights out? Sounds like he's seriously mood-altered, if he's normally not like this.

But then - IS he normally like this, only a little less obviously? Or is he normally a decent, caring, loving, respectful man and father?

The other option (sorry) is that he's met someone else on his night out and it's made him question being with you. But if he does it every 2-3 months, then that's less likely than him taking something, I think.

Botanicbaby · 27/07/2015 07:36

No wonder you've had enough!

Do you get to go out on fri and stagger back at midnight?

Do you get to disappear upstairs for 2 hrs sleep mud afternoon leaving him to childcare?

Thought not.

Your relationship is unequal and he's taking you for granted.

Calling you a nagger? I despise that word, it's never used to describe men. I wouldn't put up with his shit, bet you can't even have a discussion as it's not what he wants to hear?

Botanicbaby · 27/07/2015 07:38

mid not mud!

Someone else would be welcome to him, what despicable behaviour.

Charlie97 · 27/07/2015 07:56

I'm with Dorothy! has he taken something on his night out?

But whatever, you don't deserve this and I would be seriously issuing a no more notice and mean it!

pocketsaviour · 27/07/2015 07:57

Does he use coke? because this sounds like a typical comedown.

Thishurtsalot · 27/07/2015 08:03

Honestly? It sounds like he's tired and grumpy.
Doesn't everyone feel like this after a late night?
Not excusing his behaviour but it doesn't sound like drugs or women etc.

Yarp · 27/07/2015 08:04

Good thinking everyone

Are these moods always after a night out OP?

DixieNormas · 27/07/2015 09:03

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

CrispyFern · 27/07/2015 09:07

Coming down off coke doesn't turn a normal nice person into a complete knob!
If he's acting like a knob, it's because he's a knob.

LindyHemming · 27/07/2015 09:16

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Yarp · 27/07/2015 14:22

Crispy

taking coke in the first place makes people knobs. Imo

Joysmum · 27/07/2015 15:14

There's s big difference between being snappy and being dam right nasty. He sounds nasty which I wouldn't stand for, snappy I wouldn't like me but since I've been known to be snappy then occasional snappiness wouldn't be a deal breaker like nastiness would be.

Branleuse · 27/07/2015 15:30

has he been out clubbing.

Thinking of the old "suicide tuesday" after a saturday night on mdma

Imnotaslimjim · 27/07/2015 16:35

Is it always after a night out? I'm wondering if he's feeling guilty for something......

MagpieCursedTea · 27/07/2015 16:40

Have you spoken to him about these episodes when he's back to his normal self? If he's usually more reasonable, I would try and engage him in an honest conversation about it then rather than trying to talk to him when he's being so unpleasant.
It's not an acceptable way to behave but if it's out of character for him then I'd give him a chance to explain and/or work out what's causing it.

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