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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Relationship advice

4 replies

tickled90 · 21/07/2015 17:41

Ok so my BF died 6 years ago and ever since his best friend and I have grown close, in a completely amicable way.. until very recently. I' ve started wondering about the friend in a different way. I'm just confused, how do I know if I have feelings or is it just because I admire him so much? He's helped me through thick & thin and vice versa. We slept in the same bed recently, we didn't do anything.. but it felt wonderful being so close! Maybe I'm just lonely as I havent seen anyone since the death of my BF and I have a 7yrld DS.

OP posts:
8angle · 21/07/2015 17:46

I know it sounds scary, but why don't you talk to him and explain how you feel?

I hope it works out well for you and so sorry for your loss.

tickled90 · 21/07/2015 18:05

Thanks I know I should but there's so many blocks. I don't even know if I truly like him that way so should I risk our friendship and I've learnt through talking to him in the pas that other friends have 'warned' him away from me when we were getting really close.

OP posts:
8angle · 21/07/2015 18:12

I think you should talk to him, a "friendship" with unrequited feelings will just lead to heartache and stress longer term.

I would not worry about "other friends" he is an adult and will make up his own mind.

With either friendship or relationship honesty and communication is surely key.

I would also say that if he does not want a relationship, this will allow you to draw a line under it and be open to other people.

I know it seems like the most painful route to take, but whatever happens, longer term it is going to be better for you to know.

tickled90 · 21/07/2015 18:38

Yeah you've hit the nail on the head. Thank you!

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