I'm in love with a friend!! Advice please ��

[Brightstar86]

Help!!!!! Well it goes like this... I met this guy about 5 years ago, we dated for a while and for the time we did it was like we both liked each other as much of the other. Was totally loved up and it was all going amazing making plans for the future. Then it all went a bit pear shape... Things were not going smoothly with my ex (who I had separated from coz he had a affair but on the other hand didn't want to see me move on yet he was with his new girlfriend) and then this guys ex got back in touch with him and started trying to pick up where she left off ( she cheated on him and was a real bitch to him but she, at the time, always had his heart) so it was enevatable that she would get him back.. So he went with her, I moved on, then he saw the real person she was (a lying cheating using nasty person) and decided he's better without her. Then he starts showing up at my work but I was with some one... ANYWAY, coz I was with someone he try's to move on, finds a girlfriend and this is where we are today...

So we chat by text now and again. We always get on so well. Same sence of humour, always there for each other when we have problems. Problem is I just want to be with him. We were made for each other in my eyes. Yes he has a girlfriend just now so I would never EVER do anything while he is with her.
During our last convo he has said that he doesn't see his relationship going any further the spark has gone and he doesn't have a connection with her sexual or emotionally. He is 36 so wants kids but he don't want them with her. I am 35 and so would want another one sooner rather than later.

The problem is that I just want to tell him. I like him so much and have done for the whole time I've known him!!! I'd have his children and I've had many relationships after the father of my oldest child and have never thought that with anyone else. we just click. He is hard working, caring and also is a great role model. Every time we talk about each other's relationships we both want the same things that are missing at the moment with the other person!!
So do I tell him?? Do I just leave it?
My heart is actually hurting coz I just feel it's him I want. I'm acting like a child I know!!!! But I feel so strongly.

Advice needed please ????
Thank you guys x

If you're likely to get to see him then email him, I just think text is totally inappropriate for something that serious and it could well be misinterpreted.

That should say if you're not likely to get to see him ^^

We don't meet up that often now becoz he has a girlfriend and it doesn't seen right too. Which is understandable really I think.
... I'm not likely to tell him I love him lol and I am really hoping if wouldn't be like that as if I thought that I think I would just not bother telling him at all, but I guess it could go either way :/

Thanks for all your advice lovely people. I'm going to text him to try and meet for a chat with in the next few days, fingers crossed... At least he will know how I feel towards him then I've planted the seed. He can go away and think about it and what will be will be hopefully he will realise that we are made for each other

good luck, OP, you do have a good chance from what you've said.

Whatever his motivation it was very disrespectful of him to say those things to you about his current GF.

That and other things, eg the way he treated you when you were actually together (leaving you for his ex) his doesn't indicate he treats women well.

What snapespeare said... I think you should let him know how you feel but be fully prepared to be shot down in flames or for him to go a bit weird on you.

Based on experience I'm a great believer in the fact that taking ownership of your feelings and being proactive pays off in the long run (though often at the cost of a bit of short-term pain). I've been in this situation countless times where I've told someone or let them know how I feel, the initial response has been classic man panicking, running away behaviour and then after I've retreated they come running back. Quite often after I've lost interest.

The thing is that once you've declared how you feel about someone you have nothing left to lose. One or two things will happen -- either they will take you up on it or come around to it, in which case happy days, or they won't, in which case you know for sure that they're not the one. But you won't have any more of the angst and wondering.

But do be prepared for him to be uncertain or to back off immediately as they usually do. And for god's sake don't actually jump him until he's single.