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Relationships

Is this weird?

36 replies

emotionwreckage · 12/07/2015 22:01

I think this situation is ok but I may have lost sight of things a bit. I am still very close to my xh's mum. I've seen her through the death of her husband earlier this year and support her a lot now too. her sons don't live locally so she only has me really. I've received an invite from xh's brother and his wife to go to their anniversary party. xh's partner has made a couple of comments to my dd (grown up) about me being around for xh mum and saying it's a bit weird. my dd was not impressed! now I'm thinking that maybe it is weird if I go and that I may be stepping on people's toes perhaps. not really sure what to do.

OP posts:

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PerfectlyPosed · 14/07/2015 08:28

If your exH is also fine with it then I say definitely go! You have as much right to there as anyone else.

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DoreenLethal · 14/07/2015 08:31

I think it would be weird for the new partner, to have the ex hanging about to be honest. And for your ex. You see it from a different angle, of course but you did ask!

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diddl · 14/07/2015 08:36

How close are you still to your XBIL?

I mean it's two separate things, isn't it?

You get on & have a relationship with your XMIL.

What about XBIL?

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Anniegetyourgun · 14/07/2015 08:39

It was the XBIL and his wife who invited her in the first place, so I'd assume they were happy about it.

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diddl · 14/07/2015 08:46

Yes of course.

Just thinking if OP doesn't see that much of them then it might not be an issue not to go?

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springydaffs · 14/07/2015 08:48

If ex H is ok with it then definitely go. It's about family loyalty and if he's happy then all ok

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Skiptonlass · 14/07/2015 10:38

Not weird at all. I was very close to some of my ex's family. His mum in particular was wonderful and I still miss her. I'm in a different country now but we keep in touch.

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HoldYerWhist · 14/07/2015 11:43

It just seems a bit like not moving on to me.

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Stubbed · 14/07/2015 11:54

My dh's ex is still friends with mil. Doesn't bother me at all, why would it? They are friends as far as I can see, even if they met through mil's son. Think the ex is being crazy.

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desertmum · 14/07/2015 11:58

Not weird at all. My exBIL (Sister's ex) came to big family events after they separated, visited my parents when he was in the area. He was a lovely man and the father to their four grand children. Dsis new partner had no problems.

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HoldYerWhist · 14/07/2015 12:01

To be clear, my in-laws are great friends with dh's exes and I personally have no issue with it at all. What I'm saying is if I was to split with him then I wouldn't still be involved with his family. It's just not for me.